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Stop the world I want to get off

4 replies

ChocolateDinosaur · 17/09/2017 16:12

Anyone feel like this? I just want to pause everything and deal with things one at a time so as not to feel so overwhelmed. If only I had the motivation.
Struggled with depression and anxiety on and off for about 20 years now. Been on and off the drugs but resigning myself to being on them for years as I just don't do well without them. There's things I don't like about them but it's better than being in the pit of despair all the time.
Currently 18 weeks pregnant with number 2 and this time ignored the voice that said I should stop the drugs in pregnancy. However I feel myself slipping back into the pit and I hate it. My brain is telling me that no one likes me and even my family have no interest in me apart from things I can be useful to them for. I know this is unfair but hasn't stopped me sobbing on and off most of the day.
DH has been working so much recently I've felt like a single parent and I'm just ridiculously lonely and exhausted dealing with a threenager who swings wildly between absolutely lovely and complete stroppy nightmare.
I think I probably should up the meds but feel so guilty for baby 2- I know the risks are small but what if?
Anyway not sure why I wrote this, probably for therapy! Thanks for reading

OP posts:
LEMtheoriginal · 17/09/2017 17:05

Sending hugs (sorry very unmnet) have you spoken to your Dr? Do you get any specialised antenatal psych care?

NolongerAnxiousCarer · 17/09/2017 17:11

As you say the risks to baby 2 are small and need to be balanced with the risks that not taking them would pose to you and the impact that would have on the whole family. Are you under a perinatal mental health team? If not I would ask to be refered to one. It's so tough when you feel like this.

ChocolateDinosaur · 17/09/2017 17:14

Thank you Smile
I saw my dr last week, we discussed mood and I said things had been up and down but I was happy to continue as we were. Just seems to be getting worse though. Part of me wonders how much is hormonal pregnant woman so I guess I'm biding my time a bit. Lots is circumstantial too so need to rediscover my coping strategies, although finding the overwhelm a bit paralysing

OP posts:
ChocolateDinosaur · 17/09/2017 17:15

Agree re: perinatal MH team that sounds like a sensible step

OP posts:
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