Borderline Personality Disorder

[RallyRoundTheFlagBoys]

Has anyone been diagnosed with BPD? If so, pls tell me how it affects you, and what made you seek help?

Hi op, I was diagnosed in November last year.

Where I am it is referred to as "emotionally unstable personality disorder "

I was seen by the MH nurse on 10th November and then they discussed my case and on the 28th November I was given the diagnosis, along with OCD.

I have always felt like I don't fit the description for BPD to be honest though i may be generalising here, I've never had any suicidal thoughts, I don't easily attach to people, if anything I'm quite the opposite and identify much better with bi polar.

I know someone who has BPD who has always self harming and that's how she became known to the team and ultimately got her diagnosis. She was also very attatched to certain people and became obsessive with them.

It's like anything though I suppose, there are massive variations of the condition.
Maybe I do fit the descriptors better than i realise, it's a spectrum of symptoms and will affect everyone differently.

Would you like to talk about it?
Am here to listen

Hi,
I have also recently been diagnosed with BPD. For me, it sums up my entire life. I've struggled with depression and anxiety since a teenager and had bad relationships.
I get help with the perinatal mental health team and they diagnosed me. How do you find it affects being a parent? X

Thank you very much, both of you. I've never self harmed (unless you count really excessive food consumption and self isolation). I do have wildy swinging emotions on any normal given day. I'm not ok, and I know I'm not, I guess I am scared to go to the doc. I had a very traumatic childhood (I know it's easy to say that, but I really did), and couldn't tell anyone. It blighted me for many years as an adult, but eventually I reached a stage where I could accept it happened. Then I got to be able to not be bitter about it. Finally I was able to actually live, and not just exist. But this last few years I seem to be going backwards and it's almost as if I have regressed to grieving for what should have been (while still being the happiest I have ever been). I think that I need help, but I d don't want to open up a huge fan of worms. One of my parents was a desperate alchoholic, and having looked at the symptoms checklist on Adult Children Of Alcoholics most of them fit me like a glove. Really, I don't know what to do. Sorry.

Hi again op, it's brilliant that you opened up to us here, it's a great start.

So that's 3 of us here so far and no doubt we all have very different experiences.

I can massively identify with the food issue, it's like I am never full and am constantly thinking about the next meal, I am a size 20 and carry my weight quite well but my fibromyalgia is massively affected by the extra weight and I need to do something about it ( my to do list is as long as my arm )

I had quite the opposite childhood though, it was great. We didn't have loads of money but had a good life, no issues.
The consultant seemed surprised at that.

I also isolate myself a lot. I have loads of good friends and often put off social events as I just can't face it. When I do go anywhere though I'm the life and soul of the party ( maybe that's a mask? )

My dc are 6 and 14. They know about the physical health problems as it massively impacts me but less about the MH problems.

What I do know is that I often try and be the perfect little housewife, this comes with the OCD too I suppose but I'm very aware of how my kids are dressed and how my house looks; everything has to be perfect and that's not real life or sometimes achievable.

It would be great if your thread was used as a support thread for those with BPD.
I am still coming to terms with the diagnosis so talking to others will surely help us all.
Just an idea

I also had a bad childhood. My parents divorced when I was a baby so I spent time with my mum, my grandparents and when it was convenient, my father. My mum had to be the life and soul of the party and that party was usually in our kitchen.
As I grew up I was bullied and went on to have abusive relationships. My first time was an older teenager taking advantage of me.
I am now happily married and have a beautiful 14 week old baby boy. Perinatal depression has put me in a bad place that I am struggling to get out of.
It's light a switch; one minute everything is okay and then it's really not okay. Do either of you feel like that? It's incredibly overwhelming.
I also eat like I was starving and I'm never full. It's hard to eat healthy at the moment. As with my house, I'm awfully messy and my husband is constantly behind me with a Hoover xD

That is exactly how I feel Jess. I can go from ecstatically happy to extremely depressed within the space of minutes. I have a wonderful husband (who has put up with me for 27 years) and two lovely children. I'm extremely messy and disorganised in every way. I can't get a grip, basically.

I too never feel full and could eat and eat.

Knowing your husband has stuck around really gives me the confidence to hope mine will. I'm so scared that one day he will have had enough of me and leave. I try to be the woman he fell in love with but this version of me turns me into someone I'm not.
Showering is me getting a grip