Seriously not sure how much more I can take with constantly being ill. Suffer from crohns and have started flaring today. In so much pain. Getting pains like I need the toilet but all that is coming out is blood and mucas. I'm at the lowest of the lowest at the moment. 5 years ago was diagnosed with cancer and I am just wishing they hadn't found the cancer and I was left alone peacefully to die. Going through a very hard patch with my husband at the moment, haven't really got no friends. People drop you very quickly when you can't go out on nights out or have to cancel at short notice. Not close to my family. This sounds really bizarre but the only thing that is keeping me from over dosing is my dog and what he would do without me but at the moment I'm thinking about both of us taking too many tablets. Why didn't the hospital just leave me and let die 5 years ago?