First ever panic attack... need a hand hold

[Babybeesmama]

Just had my first ever panic attack.. I feel so distressed 😓. I felt like I couldn't breathe & as tho my heart was going to explode.

It was brought on because I was upset. I have 3 Dc's - youngest is 3 weeks old.

I am totally paranoid about SIDS & accidents (part of my job involves forensic work in these circumstances so i am more exposed to it). I am constantly banging on to DH about not falling asleep with him etc. Tonight I went up to bed & came down 2 hours later to find DH asleep on sofa with the baby. DH had had a few drinks too which made it even worse.

Baby totally fine, but I utterly freaked out at him. Am laid awake thinking 'what if?'. DH is mortified at himself & was terrified when I had panic attack & wanted to call an ambulance. I can't bring myself to say anything to DH to make him feel better because I almost can't forgive him. He feels terrible & is so upset. How do we get over it? I'm exhausted feeding a newborn day & night & now can't sleep. Feel jittery & dizzy still.

Didn't want to read and run.

I understand how you feel, when my dd was born I barely slept for the first month as I was terrified of SIDS. During that time I ended up falling asleep with her on me a lot out of exhaustion, one time I woke up and the covers was over her mouth. I was mortified, felt so bad thinking what if, she was completely fine but I know how you feel. Do you suffer with anxiety normally?

If you have another panic attack try to make yourself cough, I find it helps bring my heart beat back to normal rhythm and then usually I can have a little cry and/or a nap to get over the adrenaline rush if needed.
Hand hold from me, being over tired doesn't help, try to rest if you can.

I doubt he'll make the same mistake twice.

Be kind to him and yourself

I had pnd with the 2 others. I have felt more anxiety symptoms since he was born.. been doing stuff like grinding my teeth & jaw clenching in the day. And not trusting anyone else to look after the baby.

I desperately need to sleep but I know I won't now. Everytime I think about what could've happened I feel panic rise in my throat x

Serf.. that's the only logical way I can look at this.. he was scared seeing me like that but maybe that will make him realise & never do it again x

Go and have a chat with your GP tomorrow. It's worth discussing if it's impinging on your life this much.

Do you have a paper bag
to breath into? Would that help do you think?

Yes the fright does make lessons stick x

I've managed to calm my breathing down. I'm so tired but can tell my adrenaline is still high. I'm exhausted but don't think I'll sleep. Up feeding anyway.. keep looking at my beautiful baby thinking what if. 😢 & then feel equally overwhelmed that I feel I can't trust anyone else to look after him x

I complete sympathise I am still like this with DS3 and he is 18 months. I bought a monitor which sets off and alarm if there has been no movement, including breathing for 15 seconds which has helped me a little, would something like that help you? Ds is still in our room and the first thing I do when I wake is listen for his breathing. I lost dd2 at full term though which has scared me.

I have one of those monitors.. & I still check he's breathing even with that.. I know part of it is my job & things I've seen. I've just told DH SO many times about not falling asleep with him.

So sorry to hear of your loss 3.. 🌺 x

I look & feel like I've been dug up this morning...

DH is really upset & looks ill. I feel bad as he's cried so much. We had a hug & I told him it's ok & it's just a mistake & I know he won't do it again. He said he feels like he's let us down :(.

I need to get ready to go to this sling meet.. I really want to go but I'm terrified of getting upset or having a panic attack again. X