Think dh is in the midst of a nervous break down and don't know what to do

[peppajay]

I think my husband is having a nervous break down. He finds it really hard to bond with our autistic son and they have zero respect for each other. Hubby has always hated mess noise and disorder. Unfortunately children bring all of this. He has completely lost it the last 3 days in row as I have been so busy with work and end of term stuff and kids are a bit hyper and noisy and house a bit of a mess. Any way he has come home from work to noise and mess - but to me just normal family life mess - but he says hs eyes see it as total destruction and the noise -the tv and a bit of over excited kids enthusiasm- as 20,0000 overhead helicopters, he falls to the floor and just sobs uncontrollably. He says I don't understand how his head can't cope. I don't know what to do as he refuses to get help as he doesn't believe he has a problem he thinks I should be able to keep the house pristine and the kids quiet .

It sounds like your husband has ASD himself and is in sensory overload. I'm sorry I have no advice . Would he see a doctor about how he's currently feeling?

I agree completely - that screams autism. Would he be willing to be assessed for ASD? Or read up about it and consider whether he may be on the spectrum himself?

I have thought this for years but he believes he is fine its just the people around him who don't know how to behave. He doesn't believe in autism hence why him and my son clash. Just wish he would admit it to himself. What do u do if the person will not help themselves??

He doesn't believe in autism hence why him and my son clash.

Blimey, that is a tricky one! What's he like in other ways? It's hard to say without a bit more background about your family. Denying your son's autism is not acceptable, though, and will be damaging to your son as well as the family relationships/atmosphere.