Whats the point of trying to do be the best parent you can when you get no thanks or gratitude from anyone and end up with it all thrown back in your face?

[juicychops]

Looked after my niece last night and she didn't sleep at all so neither did i. my ds (2.2) was as good as gold all night, and all morning and all the way to my sister's house where i dropped my niece back home.

I felt like shit all morning but ds was so incredable good that it made me really happy as he isn't like that very often. I told him how good he is being all morning and bought him a pushchair as a reward for being so good.
He pushed it around wonderfully and continued the great behaviour.

An hour ago i asked him to stop climbing on something in the supermarket. He had a HUGE tantrum all the way home and i had so many bags and his little pushchair as well as his big one and he wouldn't walk but also kept hanging out pushchair.

Got home in floods of tears. Whats the point in doing anything nice for him? i know he's only 2 but he ruins any nice things we do. Its totally ruined my day now cos im going to feel like shit the rest of the day.

He only has me doesn't see any of his dad or his dad's family so no one sees how hard i try and how difficult it is. and it just gets thrown back in my face. Whats the point cos i cant see it

I know i must sound really pathetic but its like this all the time. Feel down enough at the moment as it is so its a real effort to do anything enjoyable with him. Im just so fed up of him making me feel like a failure

juicy - he's 2. that's what they do. It's a rollercoaster of good behaviour you can't believe and such tantruming hell you can't believe it's the same child.

you're not alone, they all go through it, it's the only way they can get their point across, he didn't want to stop doing it, you wanted him to stop = massive tantrum.

Stay patient, have a cuppa and congratulate yourself on a lovely boy and being a great mum.

Also they are led by their tiredness and sugar levels. An hour of play takes it out of them and the mood can change quickly.

Don't let it spoil your day. Get him to have a nap and put your feet up with a biscuit and a bit of MNing!

Juicychops I really feel for you. My ds can be an absolute handful - he is the same age 2.2 and I often feel mentally and physically exhausted.

His dad is absolutely useless, a very selfish young man indeed and all the responsibility is left to me. He sees his son one evening for 3 hours a week and then one evening at weekends - he can't fathom how exhausted I am all the time.

I do understand how you feel - my ds can be a loving little boy and then just turns into a the monster from hell. I often find myself crying to get to sleep.

Do your family help out much?? Or any friends close by?

try and keep your chin up as so many people tell me it's just his age - but I know it doesn't feel that way.

xxx

Like Kbear says about the nap - I have just put my ds down for an hour - he seemed to be knocking it out but I feel that I really need that time to myself.

xxx

He is very tired so that probably has something to do with it. my niece woke him early this morning plus he lost an hour anyway.

family don't live that close so they dont help out very much so its mainly just little old me.

I know its normal for his age, i just don't feel i cope well with it at the moment. I cant ignore it and as soon as he starts i can feel my blood start to boil and i start breathing really fast and i cant control it. i just have no patience at this stuff at the moment.

He's eating jelly and watching a shark tale at the moment so im eating some biscuits and trying to chill

You feel your blood boiling because you need a break. Ask for some help, for an hour's break once a week - go swimming or walking or shopping - whatever makes you relax. But you did need an hour. Have you got a friend you can trade an hour with?

Juicy, this doesn't help you at all but I wanted you to know that I often feel like this too.

Twice, I have taken DS (18 months) out for a walk with his little pushchair (against my better judgment) - we had a lovely walk to a cafe, had a small hot chocolate and shared a cookie. I spent ages telling him how good he was and what a lovely time I was having. On both occasions, he has had a huge tantrum on the way home because I wouldn't let him run into the street. I ended up carrying him under 1 arm - his arms and legs flailing, trying to hit, kick and bite - and his pushchair on my other arm. Tis all quite embarrassing and I always wonder why I bother doing nice things for him when he blatantly doesn't appreciate them.

I have to remind myself that he is 18 months old and isn't doing it to upset me, but I do wonder what the point is.

BTW, you are doing exactly the right thing, trying to chill with a few biccies while DS watches TV. Can you do as Kbear suggested and get a bit more time for yourself each week?

try and give yourself a break

...there is no thanks for having children and doing the best for them as any parent will tell you however old your children are

useful phrases for the future are

you are driving me up the wall

am I the only one who ever does anything round here

bloody kids

I scarificed everything for you

etetc

Hello everyone just had a couple of hours sleep feel a bit better now. ds kept coming up and giving me kisses then going back down to watch tv. He hasn't caused any mischief as far as i can see... yet!

That's exactly why we do it - all those kisses for no reason. It really is worth it, even if the tantrums make you feel like crying.

Glad you are feeling a little better.

x