I'm sinking, please help

[MostIneptThatEverStepped]

I feel as though I've been walking a narrower and narrower tightrope of "normal" recently and have just lost the will or ability to keep balancing/trying/pretending everything is normal.

I've been on ADs for a couple of years, they work for a bit and then don't (or do I get worse?)

I've got financial stress, no partner to lean on, young adult children who need emotional and financial support, an ill elderly mother who is not too ill to start a very draining argument, work full time and commute and feel like I have just crashed. I have spent all day in bed. I don't know when/if I can cope with work. Oh and I drink too much.

Please, can anyone offer any ideas or advice? I have annual leave in a couple of weeks but quite honestly I feel like I can't go back to work next week, my resources for coping are all burned out. But will anyone at work take that seriously or will it seem like I'm being dramatic or lazy?

I'm sorry you're feeling this way OP (with possibly one of the best usernames ever)

You probably don't need me to tell you that alcohol is a depressant so it will counteract the effects of the anti depressants. And it will affect your sleep, which will also affect your mood. But it is hard to stop- would you say it is problematic?

It sounds like you have lots of stressors in your life. Do you do anything for you? Are you getting any support from anyone with regards your mum or your financial situation?

If you can't go back to work who cares whether they take you seriously or not? If you feel that you are not able to work then why shouldn't you take the time off?

Thank you so much dangermouse (clearly you have excellent taste).

Yeah the alcohol is a coping mechanism but I'm very much aware that it brings its own problems. I feel like I've hit a brick wall there as without it I can't cope with the other problems.

Guess I'll have to see tomorrow what resources I can summon up with a view to work next week. I won't rule out calling in sick though.

I agree you've got a lot of stressors going on there op, take care of yourself through all of this. Is there anyone who can take pressure of with your mum? Just to allow you breathing space? Also take time of work, put you first.

Tomorrow's another day can you do something for you, even a walk or a coffee with a friend.

It might be worth going back to doctor about your ad, there maybe more treatments available x

Crap sorry, not sure why that reposted.
That was meant to say...thank you bella, I do have siblings to take the pressure of with my mum but I am the soft target and twas ever thus.
Will endeavour to get out of the house tomorrow, another day in bed probably won't help much!

I understand the alcohol thing (currently also drinking more than is healthy for me). At least it's feeling different. I gave up for dry Jan and really noticed afterwards, when I had a drink, how awful mood wise I felt the next day from a relatively small amount.

It's easy to say don't drink but harder to put into practice. At least with dry Jan there was a lot of other people in the same boat. I did see a dry for July thread in chat though...

It's on my radar to give up/drink less, definitely. But the more time goes on, the harder it gets to take that first step. It's a case of weighing up which is the worst problem at the moment. That could very well be the one that's making everything else worse.