Hi,
I've been wondering for a time whether what I've experienced is fairly normal part of getting older (now 36) and my memory disappearing or something more.
Ok, so as a child, I had some psychological abuse along with some sexual from a parent. ( the sexual was nothing traumatic but fairly discreet or hidden) Both went on for years until I left home really. Nothing was ever brought into the open and nobody discussed t until we were adults. My sisters experienced the same and brothers to some degree. I think we probably processed it in different ways.
In my teenage years (14 tbp) I was sexually assaulted by a group of men in a foreign country which was very frightening and caused me a lot of distress for a long time. I became very depressed and withdrawn for years.
Anyhow, until my mid twenties, I always felt sad for what had happened and realised the effects on myself.
However, I have a lot of determination and i didn't want all this to effect my future goals. I've matured and changed a lot and can empathise (too much sometimes)with other people.
For the past few years however, I don't see what happened, happened to 'me'. I look at 'that' person and feel sad. I don't feel as if it happened to myself but another young person. I don't feel regret or embarrassment anymore or any sort of anger that I felt in my 20s.
Another significant event since then is that, that parent died a few years ago.
Sorry about rambling - it's late!