I have never, since a young child, been able to get any sort of comfort from others. When people offer me hugs or shoulders to cry on or a listening ear, I get extremely anxious because I simply don't know how that works or would help.
Am going to go back to the GP (as my name indicates it is a lifelong thing that no therapy or meds have helped with yet - maybe slightly take the edge off the pain but nothing curative) and I despair of ever cracking it - especially as I get older and less attractive/physically appealing.
Sometimes when someone offers kindness I have to fake-pretend that it is helping so that they will feel better and not be offended. I accept the hug and maybe have a little cry and tell them how much better I feel as that seems to make people leave me alone faster than if I show my confusion and despair about receiving comfort. That way I can get away on my own and self-soothe and isolate until the world stops spinning a bit.
Is this rare or do other people relate? And if you do relate, what strategies do you have for making yourself feel better without causing offence?