Hi, I posted this in AIBU,thought I would post it here also to get more views of people with experience in MH difficulties. Sorry it is very long.
. I'm in my early 20s, live in a house share with 2 others (not in the UK and we are not from the country where we live).one of these women in particular has been a close friend for many years, and the other I have considered a friend since I came to this country.
In September, I started a new job and became very overwhelmed and stressed.I was behaving extremely out of character, felt overwhelmingly anxious in social situations and when out and about. It got so bad that I didn't want to leave the house or even leave my room if there were other people in the house. Felt anxious in shops, would start crying when I crossed the threshold of the house because I was so relieved to be alone. I was also sleeping for about 14 hours a day. I'm a very sociable and outgoing person generally and love to be out and about so suddenly feeling like this was a terrifying experience for me.
I went to the doctor and was referrred to a psychiatrist who was not that helpful, prescribed medication but I would ideally have liked to access counselling in English, which isn't available in this area. It sounds bizarre but this literally just passed after a couple of months and I feel normal again now. I don't know if anyone has ever experienced anything like this? It improved after i went home at Christmas, so I don't know if it was some kind of extreme homesickness. I have been doing a lot of online mindfulness activities so don't know if it's that either.
Since this happened, neither of my housemates have been properly speaking to me. They stopped inviting me to things, stopped including me in little things in the house (e.g watching a movie), arranged things without asking me (weekend trips for the weekend of my birthday). I wasn't feeling sociable anyway as I say but it still hurt not to be invited. I mentioned this recently as said that I was feeling really disrespected in the house (things like having people to stay without asking me, giving people I don't know keys without asking me etc). They said that I had stopped wanting to be their friend and to talk to them, and said that I had been upset and wouldn't leave my room like this was something I had done wrong. They then said that I am now pretending to be ok (wtf) and being friendly but I didn't want to be their friend before Christmas, didn't want to confide in them or take their advice. Their advice was to move home, which was not financially possible for me and seemed extreme, without trying to sort myself out here and when I mentioned this, they both just sighed and rolled their eyes at me. I tried to confide in one of them twice and bith times later heard her talking to the other housemate about it. When I mentioned that I found this hurtful, I was told that I was draining and difficult to live with. Anyway they have said that my behaviour was too concerning before Xmas and they don't want to be my friend as I was "draining them". They literally never expressed this to me at the time. AIBU to find this hurtful after years of friendship?
As an aside, I have a lot of experience in dealing with people with mental health difficulties, my dad had depression when I was a teenager which led him to be physically violent toward me. This was obviously extremely difficult for our whole and I had confided in one of the housemates about it at the time. When I said I understood that I had been a bad friend but I genuinely hadn't been in a fit state to be a good one, she said "you of all people should understand how difficult it is to live with someone who's like this". AIBU to think the situation of being attacked by a parent who is putting the entire family under extreme stress, not working, putting his business in jeopardy etc is not comparable to this???