Oh for f**k's sake, here we go again...

[Aaaaaaarrrrgggghhhhhhh]

Regularish mner, name changed for privacy.

Recently I've been gradually lowering dose my ad dose on my gp's reccomendation. Now I'm feeling hopeless & weepy again and I think I'm going to have to put the dose back up.

Would like another baby, can't afford it. Would love nicer house in nicer area but can't afford it. Would love to give up full time job but am main money earner atm. I seem to be slogging away with no reward.

I have so much to be grateful for, so why do I need medication to be able to live my life without completely falling apart?

I could go on and on about how shit my life is...

We never go out together, don't have fun. We are permanently skint atm. That has a lot to do with it I think

sometimes yes but a lot of the time we just seem to be co-existing. Most night he sleeps on the sofa, when I a sked why he said not to read anything into it, he just gets comfy and falls asleep downstairs. Not sure if that's a symptom of something bigger.

Oh I think your Dh id a big key to whats making you sad. It isnt his fault but i think if he was a bit more supportive and understanding that would probably be the stepping stone you need to turn things around. Partners are there to support each other during these difficult times.

You could do it yourself but i believe that would drive a big wedge between the two of you, you need to feel he has helped you through this. I have no doubt you are strong enough to do this by yourself but I dont think you should have to.

The next question is then. Will you get the opportunity to sit down with Dh and get him to listen and understand and agree to help you without belittling and telling you to get on with it. If he doesnt feel the way you do it is probably because he doesnt understand. Why dont you write down everything your feeling and all the things you need and leave him to read it and think about it, that way you get to say all the things you need to say, he can read it a few times and take it in, or he can choose to not read it at all .

but keep up with the list of things to be grateful for, it keeps your head above water

XXX

Just up the doseage and try again in a few months or so.

I tried recently, I found old feelings and reactions coming back, so I put the dose back.

I'm feeling fine again. Its no big deal. It can take several years for the balance to re-adjust enough for you to come off them.

how are you feeling today aaarggh?