my name is jo i suffer from depression and anxiety.I got so worked up last year with my anxiety i made myself physically ill,i almost suffered a panic attack at the dentist and then at christmas i almost broke down in the supermarket.I am about to be made homeless there is nothing i can do.Having a home were i feel safe is very important as this is were i hide.I find new and unfamiliar places terrifying.Yet i feel safe going out with my other half.Now with the threat of homeless i feel my mind unravelling.
what does not help ,I have had depression for so long i cannot remember the last time i felt true excitement .I was at a family members wedding last year and felt no joy nor could i join in with my family.Its been like this for the longest time i have lost several members of my close family members over the past few years and it seems i have now forgotten what it was like to truly laugh or get excited over something.I am not sure how much more i can take.
Its not like my life is bad apart from being made homeless i have a loving partner and child.
But this really does not help and as a result i cannot cope with my anxiety.
Now if i go to the doctor and ask for help here is the problem .
I go by myself i risk a very bad panic attack or i go with my partner and i am to nervous to to open up.I cannot open up to extent i need for the doctor to understand my problem when hes around.Its just that i feel terrified of upsetting my partner he already has the stress of everything,low wages,high bills,homeless he needs me to be strong so that he can cope.
So i need to go back on my medication so i can handle how hard its going to get.But going by myself is hard ,i am terrified of using a phone .Just going in once by myself is going to make me very ill yet i have to physically go in to book the appointment.
I really dont know what to do