Could we have a general mental illness support thread?

[MeadowHay]

Years ago when I used to frequent The Student Room, they had a really long mental health support thread where people used to go to share their ups and downs and just chat/distract themselves or whatever else. I would have thought a site this big would have something like that but it doesn't. So I was wondering if anybody wanted to make one?? I'm not good at starting threads though, I don't tend to get many responses when I do...

I am having a relapse of my depression it seems and I have had some pretty bad days over the last week or so in particular but I am still here, plodding along, trying my best. It is lonely when DH is at work all day and I feel trapped in my flat, unable to go outside due to my anxiety but I am trying to focus on the positives and also be somewhat productive...I just feel sleepy allllll the time but I have to force myself to stay awake because DH has to go bed early for his job so he can get up early I already am sleeping about 12hrs at night and then staying in all day doing not much so if I sleep during the day as well there is no way I will be able to go to bed at the same time as him and I much prefer to go to bed with him so we can have a cuddle and so I don't feel so lonely.

How is everyone else?

Arrrrrrrrrrgh so anxious tonight. I've had to shut myself in the bedroom with a cup of tea because I am terrified that I will hit DD - it's something I have never, never done, but her behaviour is so screamy and obnoxious this evening (inevitably, given what I am putting her through) and I am so scared of myself.

Crow, in response to your question about the minefield of people out there calling themselves "counsellors", I'd suggest the following

1. Try and find someone with evidence of some training and/or professional registration. The BACP (British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy) likes to promote itself as the gold standard body, but there are others, and more credible and stringent others - counsellors and therapists from a psychology or social work background will be registered with the HCPC instead (Health and Care Professions Council), and there are other regulatory bodies too.

1. When ringing or emailing potential counsellors, try and be clear about what help you need, and try and ascertain whether the counsellor can meet those needs. Some may operate from a particular theoretical orientation or standpoint from which they will not deviate, others are more flexible and eclectic. If they're trying to persuade you into something that seems a bit unlikely or "off", trust your instincts.

Hope that helps?

Joanna I really believe some children can sense the problems and it makes them play up.

I've had to leave the room twice today. DD's new thing is repeating everything half a dozen times.

It's really not her fault she has speech problems but my god it drives me up the bloody wall.

Yes I am well aware I am totally fucking up DD's life. DS seems more resilient for now... but for how long?

I did try posting asking for help on MN once. All I got was a mob lynching trying to force me to understand what I was explaining that I already knew, which is that I am a shit parent. Then numous posters telling me to "get help" and accusing me of being defensive when I pointed out that nobody just "gets help" the nanosecond they need it.

Sorry for the rant. Not coping at home, not coping with the kids. Angry about everything and nothing. Don't know how the hell I am going to make it through until the therapy appointment on Tuesday, don't know how the hell the therapist is going to help.

There's a pile a clutter in the corner of the living room that I have been asking the DCs and DH for days to sort out. WIBU just to put it all into the wheelie bin?

You won't be fucking up her life.

People who fuck there kids up certainty don't think they are and try and get help.

It's a blip. If you had cancer and were getting treatment you wouldn't be coping particularly well either.

(Not comparing MH to cancer at all, just that any illness can effect parenting in someway)

Some posters love sticking the boot in. There's a poster in legal matters a week overdue getting some choice comments at the minute

Joanna sounds like you're really struggling. I think most of us on this thread have been there. I agree you won't be messing your kids life up. It's a blip and you will come out of the other side. Sorry you didn't get very helpful responses on your thread, mn can be an excellent source of support (this thread for example), but sometimes it can be the opposite.

Saw my GP yesterday and it was really positive. I told her about how I didn't call the counselling service she recommended due to my fear of phones apparently there are some services at the library next door to the surgery I can access if I need them. But I don't feel like I need to at the moment. I really feel like the sertraline has made such a difference, I almost feel like a different person. I no longer wake up with that feeling of dread in the morning. I don't constantly feel overwhelmed and like I need to escape, I'm more affectionate with dp. didn't even realise how bad I was until I started the meds as those feelings had all become normal to me iykwim.

I've got a script to pick more medication up next week, and then she's put it on repeat for 6 months so I just have to go in or ring up to order more rather than try and get an appointment each month.

Delete that sounds really positive .

Pleased your appointment went well.

I have felt this way off and on for the past 25 years. Just so tired of the effort required in remaining hopeful.

Mood has improved, but there's an underlying low there at the moment. Think it may possibly be hormone related as I'm due my period in a few days. Never normally affects things but I suspect that + being onemployed = brain saying enough is enough.

Lollipop my anxiety goes haywire when I'm due on, hormones and MH don't really mix.

Joanna It's hard to remember the good times whilst your going through the bad

Hello can I join in please? I'll try to be brief! I'm 35 with a 3 yo and 3 mo. Lovely supportive DH and very long standing history of depression and anxiety. Suffered since I was 14.
Most recently started on sertraline while I was pregnant with DS2 and went up to 150mg.
My DH works away overnight occasionally. Usually 2-3 times a month.
Week before last I suffered a massive panic attack whilst DH was away and it has kick started a really nasty bout of anxiety unlike I've ever had before. My mum is great and has helped out. DH due away for three nights from tomorrow and I'm dreading it. My mum was meant to be working (nurse, night shift) and I'm actually paying her to stay with me instead because I can't cope.
I went back to GP on Friday and she has agreed to change me back on to fluoxetine which I've had success with in the past. In the interim I have propranolol and premazine for the anxiety. I've also been referred to MH service but as usual there is a wait.

I'm just a mess today. I keep crying at DH because I don't want him to go tomorrow. I feel so guilty because I know he feels bad for working away. I hate feeling like this and it feels like I'm going to feel down and anxious forever.

Thank you if you got to the end!

Sorry I seem to have killed the thread

Sorry Hope I've been distracted today.

I hate waiting for new meds to kick in. 3 weeks feel likes forever at the time.

I think your GP has the right idea promethazine is what I use to calm my anxiety and the propropronol should stop any physical anxiety.

Are you feeling any better?

Don't apologise unborn, I was worried I'd scared everyone off!
I'm feeling a bit numb today. DH heads off for work at 10am and I won't see him until Thursday which is the source of my anxiety at the mo so I'm sure it'll kick in soon. Got the meds ready.
Hope you're ok today

Can I join? I have anxiety which is pretty constant and over the last year I have been having episodes of really low mood which only last for about a week at a time. I imagine it's something to do with hormones and the last time I went to the gp they were reluctant to give me anything because it's not constant. I feel completely dead inside when I'm like that and find it so hard to engage with the dcs who are only 2 and 3.
I'm not sure if it's because my anxiety was through the roof after Christmas after all the family visiting and this is the result. I take propanolol which takes the edge off the anxiety but no idea what to do about the sporadic low mood. Gah! hopelass I'm the same when DH has to work away. Anxiety is so rubbish.

Hello, can I join in? I was on 150mg of Sertraline for months and was talking to my GP about trying a new antidepressant as DH said that it wasn't working. We had been diagnosed with infertility and from April had been waiting for our IVF referral (which still hasn't arrived!)

I went to visit my mother at Christmas, she was physically abusive growing up and I shouldn't have gone by my neighbours make a lot of noise and I couldn't stay there. She was her typical self at Christmas, going as far as to shout at me on Christmas day as DH wasn't dressed to her liking. She was rude to DH and referred to our lack of children at church while holding a microphone. Again, I had rather foolishly told her about our low sperm count. I stupidly hurt myself quite badly and DH had to patch me up.

We've now found out that we are pregnant and so I immediately came off the Sertraline. I'm having some intrusive thoughts but I'm trying lift my mood by just thinking about the baby. My GP doesn't know about the self harm as I was worried they would cancel the IVF referral.

Sorry for the rambling.

Welcome to all new people.

Just had my face-to-face assessment for PIP. Lady from Capita came to our flat for it. Was pretty tough having a stranger sitting there going "so do you have plans to end your life?" and stuff urgh and she made me tough her as well for part of the physical exam which was awful for me. She made some sympathetic comments though like "you're doing really well" and "I can see how hard this is for you" etc as my anxiety was awful so that's something. Fingers crossed now, she said it can take the DWP 2-3 MONTHS to make a decision on my claim . Second time I've been through this process in three years .

Hi, new to thread, I have agoraphobia and panic attacks, they are getting worse recently and I can't find the strength to do much. It's like a door I can't get through, I see a counsellor who says "you can do it, why don't you just do it" think I need a new one.

Meadowhay, my pip assessment was about the same, 2nd one for me too, i heard back within 4 weeks so you may hear earlier.

Meadow mines due March. My last assessor gave me 0 points

I think the assessor was more batshit then me. I got the reasoning back and got 0 points for taking and managing medication. I was on three day prescriptions at the time

I had been discharged from hospital after an OD a few days prior. I ended up taking it to appeal and got awarded high care and standard mobility.

Always always appeal any reading this.

I lived abroad for a short-ish while so I had to end my claim when I moved abroad and now that I've moved back have had to reapply. I keep going over the assessment in my head today panicking that she is going to do me over with the report because she did minimise some stuff or appear not to be interested in some things and I did feel rushed. My mental health is quite complex and being on the autistic spectrum is complex because it affects so many areas of my life and she just rushed through it all and then went "is there anything else that your conditions affect in your life?" I was like well...there's loads of things but I'm sitting here with palpitations in front of a stranger I can barely look at, I can't suddenly recall all the info about my health and how it affects me because my mind just goes blank. Plus being on the autistic spectrum means I struggle with open-ended questions anyway and don't know what to say. I paused and said "I'm sure there is a lot more but I'm sure I wrote all the other things down on the forms I sent off". DH and I spent weeks and weeks on the forms so obviously it's not possible to recall all that detail in a 50minute session with a stranger. It's a ridiculous exercise and makes me so angry that disabled people are treat like we are on trial. She kept asking me questions that I already remember answering on the from which was really infuriating because you think either a) she hasn't even read them, so what was the point in making me spend so many weeks of my life stressing about them and fillling them in? or b) she has read them and she's asking me again purely to see if she can "catch me out" to see if I've lied on the form, which is horrible. I really need to just forget about it now though or it will make me even more ill.

I was on enhanced rate of both last time but I'm not as unwell now so I'm not expecting that much this time, I think I'm entitled to enhanced mobility because of my crippling anxiety but not sure about anything care-wise. I hope I hear fairly quickly like you mrsdarcy.

Unborn That is so ridiculous. When I first applied for DLA years ago I was rejected and had to take it all the way to tribunal where I was only awarded low rate care. It took so long that in that time I decided to apply myself for PIP and got awarded enhanced rate of both just after the tribunal decision for the DLA (and my health hadn't suddenly deteriorated in that time or anything, it was about the same really).

How is everyone anyway, enough talk of PIP!!?

Hi, I'm good thank you Meadowhay, I saw a new lady today who said I am aiming too high (going out/agoraphobia) she made me feel better about doing the little steps I have been doing. Still anxious about going out busy times though.

Can I join?

Anxiety, on a bad spell. Nearing the go-to-doctors-get-pills stage I fear.

Going to go to the GP tomorrow I think, I'm so low I fear I may slit my wrists at any moment. So better get my ass back on those anti depressants.

mrsdarcy Glad you've found a new counsellor who is more supportive of you. I agree when you have severe anxiety/agoraphobia you need to take baby steps and recognise all your achievements. It can be really hard. I can't really go anywhere on my own other than uni and work - which is the same place as I work in my SU. It is horrible feeling trapped at home sometimes.

Rachie Sorry to hear you're feeling bad anxiety-wise. If you're really struggling, make that GP appt, they can help you.

Inside Also sorry to hear how low you're feeling, please try to keep safe. If you need to talk you can call Samaritans remember or if you're in urgent crisis situation you can call 999 or go to A&E. If you are feeling so suicidal I agree it's a good idea to go to see your GP urgently so they can help you. I know how it feels to feel that awfully law, I hope today seems a little better.

I am up so early this morning and feel not too exhausted/sleepy which is a big achievement. I am about to go to work now. I have to sit on a stall today later at work with a couple of other students and entice people to come and talk to me and ask them things, eeeeeek. Really anxious but I won't be on my own so will give it my best shot and keep taking deep breaths!

Hi all
Sorry to hear about those who are low; good that you recognise it though and are able to seek help.
I'm still waiting to hear from the MH team after Gp did an urgent referral last Friday.
Very tearful today and feeling guilty about not getting on with my 3yo. His behaviour is awful and I do nothing but shout at him. I hate myself for it. Poor little mite.
DH on third day away which isn't helping. I need him home but he won't be until tomorrow night. I'm literally counting down the hours.
Gah - hope people have a better day today. for fellow sufferers.

Hopelass You're doing great, just try to take one hour at a time . Your little one won't remember you being short with him anyway at this age and all people get fed up when their kids are being naughty so don't feel so bad about it. I'm sure he is loved and well-cared for. I hate it when DH is away as well, I am always counting down like you. But you can do this!