online survey says I'm severely depressed

[Oldtimeuser]

And I think it is probably right. Have felt like this for a year at least.

I think a bereavement and a shitty time in marriage has turned into a black hole of depression for me. I've put on 2.5 stone in a year trying to eat my way out of it. I'm terrified of going to the doctors. Actually terrified as I have a huge fear of dealing with any health professional after some v bad experiences. I have private health insurance as I perceive I get less bullied in the private sector but it doesn't cover MH
I tried private counselling a couple of years ago and found first session horrible and didn't go back
Where do I start with this. Maybe a private prescription of anti depressants online somehow. How do I find a a good counsellor and how do I know what sort I need. I just cannot go to my GP.

I'm sorry to hear you've had bad experiences in the past. You are starting well though, doing the survey. I'm racking my brain to see what online resources there are available. I'll come back if I think of any.

I've had counselling three times. The best was specific to my situation. I had a decision to make and a situation to manage and she helped me.

The other two were more chatty, but it still helped to be able to moan to somebody without fear of them getting fed up with me.

You can self refer for it round here, and I'm sure you'd be seen and assessed pretty quickly, given your online assessment.

I've also had a course of psychotherapy which was transformational.

To be honest, noticing and deciding to do something are huge first steps and will take you a long way.

If you can't go to your gp can you afford to see one privately. Having some antidepressants may make a huge difference and then counselling may also be better then.
If you can't go private could you change surgeries. It's so important to get help as early as possible.
💐

I can pay for private help for a while at least. My husband had a go when I paid £50 for a counselling session last time but I will take it out in cash this time. Joint accounts only.
I have grief issues I think and relationship problems. But I suspect it's just me that's the problem :(

Counselling is great but if you have a hormone imbalance you'll need the antidepressants too.
Please get both medical and therapeutic help. The two together would hopefully make such a difference.
You're facing it that means your half way there. Keep going. 💐

There are lots of antidepressants and different people react differently to them so you really need a Dr to advise and monitor. Its not a good idea to try self medicate with things you find online. Do you work? My Occupational health department provides councelling and psychology so this could be another avenue, and the waiting lists tend to be shorter than NHS too.