Enough is enough - bloody ridiculous

[Rocklover]

Ok, firstly I am going to apologise as I know I don't have depression, although I am pretty low, and i am sure my problems will sound silly compared to others.

Ok, here goes, I wish i had changed my name as I feel embarrassed. Ok I have a weird fear about needing the loo when I am out and there not being a loo available. I have had this to varying degrees since I was a teenager, and now it is beginning to encroach on my life. Firstly I am more stressed since I split with my husband last year, so this is making it worse and I also have mild IBS.

This is really bringing me down as I get worried when I go out, I am struggling with my driving lessons because of the anxiety (I desperately want my licence), every time I walk out the door I get a tummy ache, I can't go on long car journeys without taking Immodium. Basically, I am forcing myself to be brave and do things outside my comfort zone to avoid being locked inside all the time. Sometimes I even start feeling very sick in situations that frighten me. I have discussed this with a gp in the past and they have just brushed it away. My Mum is very similar to me, although her IBS is worse.

Today I have cancelled my driving lesson, I am genuiely ill with a bad cold, but I am sat here close to tears thinking what a pathetic person I am that I can't even cope with a bloody driving lesson. I don't know what to do anymore, maybe cognitive therapy.

Just need a bit of support I guess.

many hugs.
many many hugs.

i think some kind of councelling should help.

I would say the same as custardo. Is there another GP you can see? Don't feel embarrassed, some people feel sick or any number of symptoms. Cognitive therapy is what they say these days, but I know nothing other than having seen a book about it last week in the local bookshop. It was in that series that have the black and yellow cover and called "guide for dummies..." from the titles I think they are trying to appeal to anyone who thinks they need help but don't know where to start.

Sending a hug your way. Hopefully someone else may be more helpful.

Thank you Custardo, even my Mum said this morning that I never used to be this pathetic (although not meant nastily) and she is absolutely right.

I am looking for a part time job, with little success, I don't really have any friends (although amd working on that and seem to be getting somewhere), trying to lose weight(pointless) and I am living with my parents as I have nothing since the split.

I am lucky in that I don't really need a job as I don't have to pay rent to my parents, just want one for esteem reasons, however, I don't want to be this person at 32. All of this just makes my anxiety worse.

it doesnt sound silly-it sounds like a problem that could develop into a serious phobia if left untreated.

i think you should defo try and find a more sympathetic gp as it sounds like you are suffering pretty badly from anxiety.

Hi Rocklover-Just read your post and had to reply.

I too suffer from this problem and just wanted to let you know you are not alone.
I have never told anyone about this apart from a therapist.
I can really empathise with your feelings.

I have to think through every trip that go on,planning if there will be toilets there and also went through taking Immodium and making sure I had some in my bag for long journeys.
Also the driving lessons I can totally understand as I would love to learn to drive myself but my phobia is holding me back.
It's that whole thing of feeling trapped in a car and needing the toilet and not being near one.

What I did was gradually went out on sort jouneys without taking the Immodium and reasured myself that nothing bad would happen.Then increased this to longer jouneys bit by bit.
I found sucking on a mint helped as strange as that may sound,it calmed my stomach.

I stil go through making excuses to avoid having to travel with other people in a car and have to force myself to do the simplest of things that other people take for granted.

I had a few sessions of CBT and to be honest found it helpful to talk to someone about it and learn to set myself goals to achieve ,taking small steps day by day.

The therapist recommended a book called "Overcoming Anxiety" by Helen Kennerley which I found useful and shows you how to set out charts for yourself to making those small steps to relieving anxiety.

Hope you take some sort of comfort from the fact that you are not alone in this and hope you find some answers soon.

read this and had to say.

I have a similar fear that has caused me a lot of problems since I was about 11.

One thing that I have found is the higher my stress levels are and the more anxious I am in general the worse it gets. It almost is a symptom of my anxiety.

Mine became at its worst a terrible controlling force in my life.I hated leaving the house fullstop.

For me the turning point was getting help with coping with my anxiety in general. Mostly through learning how to relax and to control these thoughts. This I did privately as I refused to talk to GP about it (I have a fear of drs as well).

Unfortunately mine extends to others as well and ds is going to need toilet training soon. That is really freaking me out.

You're not alone Rocklover.
I suffer from this too, and it's a serious problem for me. I'm very embarrassed about it. car journey's are very difficult and are impossible if anyone other than me or dh is driving. I often cancel get togethers with friends b/c the anxiety from worrying about being ill is so awful that i'd rather just stay at home. It effects me on an almostly daily basis and really gets me down.