Was this the right thing to do?

[ArriettyMatilda]

I've been feeling low for a while. Not so low that I'm unable to do anything but low enough that I'm binge eating, getting angry and frustrated with loved ones and unable to keep on top of housework. Its been going on for at least a year possibly much, much longer. It just bubbles beneath the surface for most of the time, but gets really intense just before my period. When it happened a couple of weeks ago I felt glued to the sofa and just ate and ate every day whilst dd was napping. House was a shit tip (currently getting back on top.of things, have actually dusted for the first time in months). I felt like I couldn't do anything productive or worthwhile and then realised perhaps I could book a gp appointment. I had the appointment yesterday and the gp said i could self refer to iapt or she could refer me to counselling, which I asked her to do. She talked about medication, but I'd rather do something that will help long term. Now I'm wondering if I'm worthy of counselling as my issues aren't that severe. I obviously felt worse a couple of weeks ago and I was getting really angry at dd for being a toddler so I do need help. But I am so confused about what kind of help as the iapt website makes no sense to me (I usually have no problem navigating the world wide web). Does anyone have a similar experience with NHS services and out of what is on offer, what has helped you?

No experience of apt website but just wanted to come on and say yes give the counselling a go. I was pretty much in the same headspace this time last year but I was lucky enough to get seeing a counsellor from a community based service. Not saying I'm super duper now but it gave me a wee hour every week to talk stuff thru and learn some methods for coping with the bad times. Please don't feel that you're not worthy or in need of it, just give it a go. All the best

I can't comment on the iapt website either, but....

Counselling and medication have been shown to be pretty much equally effective. A significant proportion of people recover on meds alone, and stay well.

However - counselling is better because it has no side-effects... BUT within the NHS meds can be better because there is no waiting list.

I did CBT with the NHS which was helpful. I also took a/ds, which I think saved my life. However, it's taken quite an extended period of private psychotherapy for me to really change the way I think, though, which is very expensive and not an option for everyone

If you're looking for info about depression, Malignant Sadness by Lewis Wolpert is not a bad place to start. I've screenshotted the last page.

Saying you aren't worthy of counselling suggests strongly to me that you'd really benefit. Good luck.

My not feeling worthy is more that I'm worried there are people who may be feeling worse than me and so possibly need it mote. Im glad that similar things have helped both of you. I'm reluctant to try meds, the gp did offer bit I'd rather a longer term solution that comes without side effects. I'm a bit nervous because I don't know what I'll dp for childcare for dd and because I'll actually have to think about what I'm feel instead of unsuccessfully hiding it.

I have been back to the gp this week. She has asked if I'd like medication to help me cope in the meantime but I'd really like a long term solution. She's suggested I do cbt with the iapt service and also will still refer me for counselling. I don't feel so desperate now I know something is available to help me and I've actually been able to get off the sofa this week and do house work. I'm still getting quite angry though and I am still overeating. I almost don't know how I feel because I shut away the feelings with food and TV. Has anyone else experienced this and what helped you?