Post Natal Depression

[cunningf0x]

Hi,

I was diagnosed with PND after the birth of my baby 5 months ago. I was on fluoxetine 60 mg and thought I was better.

But for the last 6 weeks I've been bad again, not as bad as before though. I'm convinced people are talking about me and saying how ugly my baby is. I think she is beautiful and we have bonded well so I don't understand where it has come from. I also think everyone is saying what a bad mother I am and how horrible my living conditions are. I'm constantly worried social services will come round.

I haven't talked to anyone about this, I keep hoping it is normal and will just go away. I'm ashamed.

Has anyone felt similar?

I had very severe postnatal depression after the birth of my last child. I'd had it after the birth of my second child so had flagged it up in advance with my health visitor as a possibility. I ended being an out patient of the postnatal mental health services at the hospital and they were brilliant. They saved my life. I had the option of being admitted to the ward but I didn't need to in the end. However, it was massively helpful just to know that the option was there if things ever got to crisis point again.

If you are having these kinds of thoughts and feelings then you need to speak to your GP, ideally, or your health visitor. They can help but it is really important that you do let them help you by letting them know what's going on. It would be good to do this sooner rather than later. If it gets to the point where these thoughts are becoming very worrying and it begins to feel desperate you can always go to A&E.

Is there anyone that you can talk to IRL about this?

You don't need to feel ashamed. PND can be awful. You just need a bit more help and support

I've had pnd since my daughter was 4 weeks old, she is now 19 weeks old. I just feel like I should not have become a mother and want to leave at times. I'm seeing a counsellor once a week and attend a pnd parent group as well, which keeps my depression at bay. Partner is supportive and takes on little ones care with me when he comes home from work. But I just feel like a carer for her and not her mother. Does it get any better? Am on medication through the doctors as well. Nothing more I can do and it's not getting better.