Apparently I'm not severely depressed?

[Psion]

My CPN mentioned today that they don't consider me severely depressed or anxious for several reasons

1. I am still keeping myself and home clean
   

1. I am still eating properly
   

1. I am not abusing alcohol, recreational drugs etc
   

1. I am still interacting with people (albeit on a much more limited basis)
   

1. I am sleeping pretty well
   

But I feel so terrible inside, and the suicidal ideation is frightening and draining. I wake in the mornings filled with dread. I cry a lot, often for extended periods.

How bad do you have to be before your symptoms are considered severe? I assumed my symptoms must mean I was severe, but was getting by on strength of will alone.

But CPN says if I was severe then I'd lack strength of will.

Any thoughts?

[fieldofpurpleflowers]

I'm bipolar and have had episodes of severe clinical depression since I was 14. When it was severe, I developed psychotic symptoms and violently attempted suicide by crashing a car. I was hospitalised because I lost touch with reality.

Unfortunately you are at the mild-moderate end of depression in the context of mental healthcare.

The symptoms you describe still affect me even though I'm successfully medicated. There are days where I want to kill myself of self harm and I have to use CBT, routine, positive self-talk to get through.

I think a lot of people think that mild depression can be medically cured, but it usually can't. When you're out of the severe end, the stuff that makes the most difference if self-management - exercise, good diet, socialising, hobbies.

My meds pulled me out of "severe" but I know I'll manage mild-moderate forever and that's fine. Just manage your own expectations of what modern medicine can do at this point.

[Psion]

Thank you for replying Wildrumpypumpus.

I think my GP won't change my meds either. I am still keeping myself and the house pretty clean and presentable. Still eating fairly well. I do have to force myself to act normal infront of DCs and find it a real effort to chat with them etc.

Did you find being admitted to hospital a positive thing ultimately?

[Room101isWhereIUsedToLive]

When I was at the height of my pnd and had a suicide plan, I still washed. I kept the house clean in a very uptight way.
I was spending every day in misery and despair. Luckily I was listened to and believed.
I got a referral for intensive psychotherapy through a university program.
So in my experience, it is possible to be very close to the edge and still functioning.
In your shoes, op, I would be approaching pals and saying that you are not being taken seriously and you need someone else in charge of your care.
It was PALS who got me on the road to the therapy.
I know how much of an ask it is, I had to do it when my gp had 'forgotten' to put me on the list for counselling.

[barbecue]

If your Tradazone has only just gone up to 250mg it will be a while longer (2-4 weeks) before you feel the full effect of this dose.

[parkykerry]

I'm considered severely depressed by my mental health team. I'm unable to keep myself clean (don't wash for up to two weeks at a time) and my house is utterly awful (social services involvement level). Regularly self harm and a couple of suicide attempts already this year. DCs do suffer I'm ashamed to say, hence I do get a lot of professional recognition of the severity. I don't think I can imagine feeling as miserable and depressed as I do now, and managing to function to the outside world - being able to keep clean and meet basic daily tasks would mean to me that I'd achieved a certain level of wellbeing. But of course it varies for each person.

I just did the Goldberg test and I got 85, where 54+ indicates severe depression.

[fieldofpurpleflowers]

parkykerry

[memememe94]

Unfortunately, it seems resources are so stretched that MH services have to focus upon how dangerous a person is (to themselves or others) much more than how much someone is suffering. It's not fair or right, but it seems there's so little money to do much more than damage limitation. I've just been discharged from hospital after 5 weeks due to psychotic depression. I had lost touch with reality when admitted. The staff are lovely, but it's clear that their hugely stretchedpsych wards are just holding pens. The whole system is a mess. (I really respect MH staffmost I've met are good at their job--no criticism intended of them.)

[Graceymac]

The CPN is most probably referring to the lack of biological symptoms of clinical depression such as insomnia, poor appetite, consistent low mood for more than a two week period, diurnal mood variation, etc.