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feel like I'm going backwards

5 replies

itsgoneagain · 12/05/2016 22:27

NC just for privacy.

Last year I gave birth to my DS. During and after my pregnancy I suffered horrendously with depression and anxiety.

Recently I've been feeling really low again. A lot has happened. A lot I really can't go into on here just in case. But police involved and DP family involved. Me, DP and DS were made homeless. I managed to go and take DS to my mums however DP couldn't come due to work.

I had to give up my dream job. It was the one thing that helped me with my depression after pregnancy. I feel lost without it.

DP suffers really badly with his mental health after what happened with his family and then having to see his friend and colleague get killed at work a month ago.

I thought I was doing really well coping with everything but I'm not. And I don't know what to do.
I'm a SAHM but have had DP with me everyday to help with DS as he left work after what happened with colleague. He starts his new job on Monday (after having paid leave from what happened). I feel so sick. I don't know how I'm going to cope without him.

I'm so tired. My DS hasn't slept for the past two months. He's been on and off with teething and then colds and then getting really clingy. I think he's feeling the stress despite how well we've been hiding it all (he's such a happy and joyful baby during the day it's just at night he is like this).

I just don't feel well at all. I want to cry and just run away from all of this. But of course I won't. How on earth do people cope with all of this??

OP posts:
coffeeisnectar · 12/05/2016 22:33

I know it's obvious but have you been to your GP? What you've both been through is bad enough without adding in pre and post pregnancy hormones which can make depression a whole lot worse.

Anti-depressants may be a good idea but if you are already taking them then see your GP for a review. Sometimes you need to try a few to find the one that works for you and as I recently did, went back to get my dose upped as I had been feeling worse and worse for weeks.

Knowing when you are slipping is good. Learning to seek help (as you are doing by posting here) is even better. The next step is getting to your Doctors and asking them for help.

Your partner also needs to seek help. You cannot shore him up emotionally while you are struggling with your own mental health plus a baby. He can't help you either.

If you haven't applied for housing then I think you need to try and sort that out so that you have your own home together plus you could look at returning to work if you feel that will help you.

As for your dc teething, speak to your health visitor or post on the parenting topic on here, lots of good suggestions about what worked for other peoples dc but again, you may need to try a few things.

Can your mum take your ds one night to give you a full nights sleep? Just one night of unbroken sleep can boost your emotional wellbeing a huge amount.

itsgoneagain · 12/05/2016 22:38

DP is on anti depressants and they seem to be working well. He will rarely show me him being upset. He's my rock tbh, helping out as much as he can.

I was on anti depressants after pregnancy however came off them as work and being active helped me more than they did. I probably should see the GP I just don't know how I can even go down and talk to anyone Sad

Health visitor visits often but everything she's suggested doesn't work. She said just ride it out.

Mum helps out when she can which I'm so grateful for

OP posts:
itsgoneagain · 12/05/2016 22:46

As for housing were on the list. But not high enough up to ever be in with a shot

OP posts:
coffeeisnectar · 13/05/2016 10:40

Please go and see your GP. Pick up the phone today and make an appointment.

It may be that you need to privately rent somewhere so maybe start looking online today. The council may be able to help with the rent deposit scheme.

itsgoneagain · 13/05/2016 16:10

We can't afford to private rent. We don't have£400 for application fees and we won't be accepted on credit checks and we have nobody to be a guarantor so completely stuck

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