I've had enough

[Tiredofeverything]

Just want to end all of the pain. My head and my heart hurts im exhausted.
Little flashes of hurting myself or being dead keep coming into my head. Too scared to tell anyone

It's really awful isn't it.
Let the thoughts come and pass and go.
Is there anyone you can call to sit with you?

Thank you for replying teal

Sorry pressed too soon...
No one to talk to or be with. I feel so lonely. I called Samaritans today even she sounded disinterested.

The Samaritans person probably was interested but came across badly

It's a sad fact that when we are very low we hear things filtered through our sadness. If you think people dislike you, any word that could indicate that will be heard twice as loud. If you are certain nobody cares, a person on the phone will sound like they are not interested. On reflection you will realise she was probably looking for information to help you, while trying to listen to your worries

They have different volunteers on duty so it's probably worth ringing again

Now tell me, do you think you are at risk of harming yourself? Have you ever had contact with local MH services? Are you able to talk to someone on duty at the MH unit of your local hospital?

Do you have a partner? Children?

Please take care.

Was able to keep myself busy today but this evening I feel low again. I think the reality of everything comes back and I'm still stuck. Just wish I could sleep and stay in bed.

Matchate - thank you for your reply. Yes I have both partner and child. The former one of the sources of my distress, the latter the only reason why I carry on.

Are you not getting on well with your partner? Is he not supportive?

When you are down you really need someone to be 100% on your side

Would it be possible to phone a different helpline if you didn't get on well with the Samaritans? If you look on the NHS website you might find a link you feel you can relate to

Your child would want you to try hard to get help. I hope you can somehow

Its worth calling Samaritans again if you feel you do want to talk to someone, you'll get a different Samaritan. They're all individuals. They also do email or text message support if that's easier for you.

What do you do when any sense of worth and self respect has gone? I've become a doormat and I don't know how to change things or have the strength to get out.

Would you be able to give your definition of Doormat? I take it you feel used, not valued?

What do you wish you could change? Do you want out of a relationship? A place? A situation?

We will try to help with advice

Can't say to much in case I out myself.
It's been a really awful weekend even dc is low and I've run out of energy to help or be supportive. Still thinking of harming myself just wish I was dead really them everything will go away.