A pat on the back thread for people struggling

[notagiraffe]

I'm trying really hard not to go under while waiting for ADs to kick in. Here's a thread to make a note of what we have achieved day by day.

yesterday I spent nearly all day in bed just playing stupid internet games. But at least I:
went for a walk in the woods
washed and changed the bedlinen
applied online for two jobs locally
finally replied to a friend's email

Anyone want to join in?

I've namechanged .. posted above ..

I've done nothing today, not feeling great, but have been looking up bf's symptoms (chronic illness) and treatment .. it's looking fairly hopeless, probably gastroparesis and few ways of controlling the symptoms. It's getting us both down and I don't know how to help or even deal with it when he doesn't feel well enough to do anything. I'm trying to keep him busy/occupied when he lets me, but I'm worried it's going to be too much for us to cope with.

Hey Talulaley, I also struggle to get myself out of bed much before mid afternoon....part of me just simply doesn't want to, the part of me health wise which is broken is extremely painful of which I cannot control, part of me finds it so much easier to stay here safe snuggled n my fleecey blanket and a hot water bottle..blind down door closed, phone on silent...sleep if I am lucky enough to do so...I am so very sad and desperately trying to glue my marriage back together...it's literally a living nightmare...I am extremely amgry and frustrated that this has happened to me now....this wasn't the plan..children have left home and now my health simply won't allow me to go which I am finding it difficult to accept...my mum passed away 3 years ago...I am one of the lucky ones that doesn't have to work but still...I haven't been out anywhere for nearly a week...the longer the days are going by, the more I am feeling nervous and scared about going out the door...what if I have an accident and don't come back home..I am so self conscious about the way I walk aswell...my illness affects my balance...walk with a stick which I cannot accept either...big hugs to everyone struggling...people just don't understand what we are all trying to live throigh

Coopsey, Talulaley here (I name changed). Really sorry to hear you're struggling so .. Sorry that everyone here is struggling No, no one understands, unless they've been there. I worry constantly about my physical problems too, about them worsening - I'm 51, I thought things started going wrong much later, like when I'm 70!

Yes, bed feels safe, I don't have to talk to anyone, do anything ..

to all.
Yup, I struggle to get up before late afternoon atm. I hear you in bed being safe hip.

Today I managed to:
Go for a walk with a friend.
Deliver some leaflets (another 30 mins walk in sunshine) for DH who was feeling unwell.
Cook a healthy tea.
Do 2 hours work. That feels rubbish but it's 1 hour more than most days...

Really like the thread. Well done to everyone who has managed to live through another day

Today I have gone to work

Well done coughingbean. A whole day at work when you are down is a spectacular achievement.

Thanks giraffe I am proud!

I haven't posted here because I am "high functioning"(!) at the moment and managing full time work in a senior responsible position. But outside of work I am a heap of mess and until last weekend my flat was a candidate for slob-shaming reality tv... my partner helped/supported me to tidy it up last weekend (well he did the vast majority himself when I fell asleep for hours in the middle of the day) and it really has helped. Today I feel I have acheived some things that last week I would not have thought possible all in one day. I did a half day at work, took the dog for a walk although I didn't manage the full circuit and cut it in half because I felt a little woozy. Came home and had a nap. Managed a dental appointment, I was so scared I was going to panic, but somehow got through it, using mindfulness techniques. Think she twigged I was anxious but she was lovely and patient. Came home and slept since but am now cooking some pasta, which doesn't sound much but it's the first time I've cooked myself anything in weeks. I've been eating takeaway, ready meals, junk or what my partner cooks when I see him.

The fact that I can see some positive acheivement today rather than all the negative (sleeping for hours in the middle of the day, not managing the full walk) is a big step in itself.

to everyone thanks for having a space to share.

Yay anxious!

Well done everyone. I'm managing to keep going at work but Im Struggling with mine and dcs health worries-absolutely nothing massively wrong with any of us but they've got bugs and temps and coughs and I'm slightly anaemic. I'm drinking too much at the moment, too. Sigh! Still, it's light when I leave work at the moment which is good.

Anxious - that sounds like progress! Well done on getting so much done.

Haggis - really hope you all kick the bugs. I never try to do anything on top of feeling ill. Just get well. That's enough in itself.

Managed 4 hours work
1/2 hour walk
quick supermarket shop
made homemade pizzas
some school admin

Cannot believe how much I got done this weekend. Did about 5 loads of washing right through to putting away, went into town and did some shopping plus cooked a meal for the first time this year!
Have moved meds to morning and had a cup of coffee which seems to be combining well.

Last week i managed to stay at my partners for 4 days (which is a major acheviement for me) and im hoping to do the same this week

Willow well done. Interesting that moving meds to morning has helped. Might try that!

WeveGot - that's great. Hope you had a good time.

Yesterday I was in bed most of the day (again!) :( but I did manage to:

Go for a lovely walk in the countryside with a friend

Finish a piece of work, research cheaper mail than Royal Mail (Collect Plus) and send it off with an invoice

Do three hours work (which I have to remind myself is two hours more than most days!) And that work went really well and had good feedback

Get changed out of really slobby clothes in time for the meeting!

Cook a chicken risotto which went down well

Hoover and tidy for about an hour.

That sounds like a lot when written down. Felt like I spent all day in bed on MN and playing online games.

Just worked out that the above is about 6 1/2 productive hours. That's a lot more than normal. Maybe I am getting a bit better...

Well done giraffe. Writing it down makes us realise what we have actually done rather than the 'beat yourself up' "oh I've only been in bed today" instinct.
I was in bed this morning but was reading so my mind was engaged then I went shopping with ds this afternoon.

Well, despite feeling 'better' I did much less today. But as you say, instead of beating myself up for another day spent mainly in bed, at least I:

showered and dressed
made the bed (twice )
did two laundry loads
worked for 1 1/4 hours
tidied the kitchen
sorted out stuff DC need for field trips
cooked a chilli from scratch
did a big internet order
rang my parents to discuss post-operative care and long term plans (tough call)

so more of a domestic day than a work day but at least a bit of stuff got done.

Today I did a morning at work, I wrote and posted a card for a relative's birthday, and attended a GP appointment. I had wanted to do a lot more this afternoon, housework, dog walk and some admin for my volunteer role. But I ended up asleep on the sofa for 4 hours and have just managed to eat a ready meal. So not a very successful day really. Although work was productive, and I'm glad I got the card posted in time as it's the kind of thing I often don't manage to do. Finding it hard to think of many positives this evening. I'll probably just go to bed soon. I should put a quick laundry load on and hang it up overnight though, and I should try and make myself get in the shower before bed. Bleh.

Anxious - a productive morning can be exhausting when you are ill. But you had one, so good on you: work, GP appointment and sorting the card out. Really that's plenty when you are unwell.

Yesterday I was in bed all day again. But at least I:
Did 2 hours work
Got out of bed to meet a client for an hour
Had a bath
Cooked a healthy dinner and then cooked another one in advance for freezer
Did a wash load
Helped DC pack bags for a school trip
Ordered some new school uniform online for DC
Put away the internet shopping when it arrived
Looked over some work for my DH for 30 mins.

That adds up to about 6.5 productive hours out of 16...
Also watched Happy Valley and read a bit of a good book.

Today so far:
Dressed and make up
Out to a meeting all morning - went well.
Collected school uniform ordered online from store.
Prepped tonight's dinner
Avoided mass consumption of chocolate (that took hours!)