Anxiety Support Thread

[YommyMommy]

Hello lovely Mummies and especially those who suffer from the dreaded Anxiety disorder!

I just wanted to see if anyone was interested in a threat to vent, post about bad days (and good of course) for those living with anxiety?

I have had it since the birth of my first born in 2008. It all came to a head around 3 years ago - due to physical health too - and I ended up going on medication for 6 months. I had to say this help massively and I have felt much better for a long time.

Fast forward to this weekend...I had a very few busy and stressful days leading up to an event and once the event was over I was honestly floored with anxiety...it just came out of the blue, I am glad to say I am starting to feel better now...but scared about how out of the blue it came :( Does anyone one else obsess that they might just somehow loose all control and loose their mind?? Its the most horrible feeling in the world, although it subsides with the panic...its just not a nice feeling.

Anyway, I just wanted to have a little vent and also started the thread if anyone is interested :)

Thanks for reading this far!
Yommymommy x

whatsthatbrightlight I went on HRT and it was a life saver. The adverse comments/ research that link HRT with increased breast Cancer has largely been reversed ( except for certain groups, smokers and those with genetic predisposition)
I got so bad I couldn't function without HRT. I would definately recommend HRT.
Sorry that you feel so bad.

Hi all. I just wondered if any of you have experienced nighttime anxiety and how you have dealt with it?
I had a terrible night last night, didn't sleep a wink and emptied my bowels six times throughout the night (sorry if tmi!)

This has happened about 8-10 times over the past year and always the same - I go to bed and fall asleep briefly and the anxiety wakes me with a racing heart and I have anxiety for the rest of the night.

I'm a bit weepy this morning as I feel I have finally identified the source of my anxiety and its thrown me somewhat. I am due to see my GP on Weds after a blood test on Tues (I had an ECG last week)

Does anyone have similar experiences please? Thank you

Anyone who has anxiety has sleepless nights. What a b***r as you sound as though you are are so bad.
Anxiety does give me stomach ache. An anxiety making situation does have a detrimental effect on my bowel. I would get a pain and bloating and then have to go to the loo.
I suffer from Claustrophobia as well. Not as bad as it was when I was younger but I always like to see a door. I like to sit facing the door in cafes etc. I hate to feel trapped.
If I am trapped then I can feel my stomach start to ache and then bloat. I think it is because I tense up.
Having done a mindful course helps. The other night I was having dinner with people that I don't feel comfortable with or have much in common with( relatives) and my stomach started to clench and then I am in pain.
I think emptying your bowels is connected with the 'fleeing reflex'
Ie, an empty bowel makes you able to run faster.?
Pain and fear affect your bowels.
Anyway, I may be writing complete bollocks as I haven't been up four times a night with diarrhoea. But anxiety does affect my bowels.
Identifying the source of your anxiety will be good penny Also surely you will get some Meds to calm you down.
I have radio 4 extra on, with ear phones, all night. If I wake up in the early hours I just put the ear phones back in and listen to Agatha Christie etc. It helps put me to sleep again.
Lots of hugs xx

holeinmyheart thank you so much for your post.
Yes, I can see the link between my tummy issues and "fleeing the situation" - that certainly makes sense.
I don't feel tummy pain or that "overwhelming anxiety" during day to day situations - without warning it will highjack my peaceful night's sleep - and even though I have tried grounding techniques it feels like it's "too late" to stop the anxiety and it continues until morning.

What I'm trying to say (not very well, I'm trying not to ramble on) is that it seems to happen at night-time only and I have no inkling leading up to the "attack" that it is coming and cannot prepare for it. I don't know how to deal with riding it out - nothing seems to help or reduce my symptoms.

I don't know if finally identitying the cause is the way to deal with the anxiety itself or if it's now become its own destructive problem?

I have never been on medication for any anxiety related issues, so did wonder if that was where I was headed.

I'm sorry, this is long and rambled, but it's the first time I've written it all down.

Well, as I have said in my previous replies, there is absolutely no shame in taking Medication for anxiety. No one knows EXACTLY what causes it.
Some time in the future they may find a chemical cause.

I hate having anxiety. I hate the horrible feelings it gives me but I am not going to leave myself to suffer. Acute anxiety can turn into depression and that is far worse.

I don't think you should tolerate the situation you find yourself in. You can get help, easily.

Thank goodness we can, otherwise I would have done a Virginia Woolf.

Go and get some Meds (at least take them temporarily) and give your mind and body a well earned rest.
Hugs

I logged in to post for some advise about possible anxiety, so I'm thankful for this thread :). I hope everyone is ok.

Basically, I'm not sure if I have anxiety, depression or something else. I'm not even sure if I have anything or whether I'm just selfish and bad tempered. I do know that I feel like I'm struggling to hold it together most days and I'm starting to experience some physical symptoms that I haven't had before, like buzzing in my ears and dizziness. I've been to the dr about them, there isn't a medical problem. I haven't mentioned anxiety but I did discuss feeling teary after the birth of DS2 5 months ago, then again a month ago but was told it was normal and that because I've bonded with the baby I don't have PND.

I just feel so overwhelmed, i have 2 DC (3yold and 5 month old) and a DH and everything just feels like a battle. Getting ready is a huge struggle on a morning, I force myself into the shower every day purely because I know that by 11am I'll be climbing the walls and I'll need to go out. I daren't go anywhere without washing my hair and applying make up, I'm scared that people will think I'm not coping. Mess and disorganisation sets me off, if things are a mess I feel like I'm out of control. I spend most days putting things away and tidying because otherwise I feel slovenly. I'm constantly exhausted, and some days I feel paralysed with being overwhelmed at stupid things like what to put in the baby bag for the day.

I'm really struggling to put how I feel into words. I'm also scared of small spaces - I can't get in a lift (great with 2 little ones) and I daren't lock toilet doors. I feel anxious and like I can't breathe when I'm driving on motorways or unfamiliar routes yet I have a satnav. If I've been out somewhere for what I think is over an acceptable time to be somewhere I feel uneasy and scared. Nights out aren't enjoyable because I worry about how I'm going to get home, I'm frightened of taxi drivers (I know!) and I'm scared of what alcohol might do to me. I have no idea where this has come from other than I've always been a worrier.

Lately, I'm anxious about my children's health and it's leaving my nerves in shreds because I can't even relax when they're in bed for the night. If the baby monitors sound my stomach lurches. Now this is not surprising as DS1 keeps picking up germs and he's been in hospital twice but, and I know this is not rational, everytime he has a temperature I want to ring an ambulance. Both of my children are still on breathing pads, I know it's not rational.

I feel stuck, I'm supposed to go back to work in a few months (maternity leave) and I don't know how I'm going to be able to get it together to be able to do it. When things come to a head at home I lose my temper and shout about stupid things. My children and DH deserve better, DH does more than his share of things with the children and around the house. I also have my mum close by for help. So with all this support I don't understand why I feel like this.

Does any of this ring true with anyone else?

God, so sorry that was long. I've struggled for so long with how to express my feelings it all just came out at once!

Hi Needtogetbetter,

Wanted to reply to your post to let you know that you are not alone on how you are feeling. It does sound like you are suffering with anxiety...although I am no medical professional and only know from my own experience and how I have felt/am feeling.

I am going through a pretty crappy phase with anxiety at the moment, but I have been through it before and knew I had to seek help before it got to bad.

I am now back on medication and having some counselling. I know I will come through the other end, but its hard to stay positive all the time. meh. I find that mornings are more difficult to cope with, especially if I have anything that I have to do during the day.

Please go speak with your GP...they can help :)

Try not to think too much about things in the future...no point worrying about what we have no control over!!

I am here to chat if you need someone to listen. I do check the site daily, but I'm on the other side of the world :)

x x x

needtobebetter you have got classic symptoms of PND. Please go back to your GP and get help.
Lack of concentration, dizziness, anxious feelings about your DCs health, not sleeping, irrational fears, how many more symptoms do you need?
Google PND.
You are in a bad way, but you can be easily helped.
Lots of hugs

Thank you so much for the replies. Reading your posts has helped me realise I'm actually not ok, I'm not. I've been kidding myself for a long time and I've felt like this in varying degrees since my 3yr old was born. It's just so strange, it's like I thought I had perspective and that I'd just 'know' if and when I needed help. But I'm stubborn and I hate to feel like I'm weak, so I avoid asking for help. I'm so grateful for the responses. Hopefully, I'll get it together and get to the GP sooner rather than later. I know I need to be having a struggle on that particular day though otherwise I just don't believe I'm being honest, I know that sounds weird. On the days I'm well I honestly don't recognise myself from the days when I'm not, I'm so far removed from them.

Today has been a good day, I'm hoping tomorrow is the same. I how everyone is ok.

I am in the same situation. I am signed off so am unpaid for a year. It is a complicated situation, but I have a post kept open for me until next year. I am already panicing about that.

I have 3 children and I am a very capable person usually. I always have worked full time as the breadwinner, with no outside support and caring for 3 children. I am now finding tiny tasks massively worrying. I want to go back to normal :(

Is anyone else to much of a doer? Since I have been off I have done DIY tasks, signed up to coffee mornings, signedy dcs up for variety of new activities, met friends, tried to plan for work next year.

I cannot stop. I do not know what rest or relaxation is. I want everything to be perfect for my family all the time. I want work to be perfect. I will help out anyone at anytime. I should accept it has now make me sick, but I can't stop!! I never want to let anyone down and I never want my children to have less than perfect experiences 24/7. I realise this is crazy, but I still can't stop.

Pegs I think that's part of it, I've pretty much run myself into the ground from being constantly busy. I'm still busy but because I'm running on empty I'm struggling. I give myself a really hard time if we miss something but I've dropped the ball on so many things lately I'm starting to think it's easier not to bother in the first place. So in my eyes I'm already a massive failure before I start, I know that's not rational.

And I want to go back to normal too. My old life seems like it belonged to someone else.

Same as me. I have had to take time out even though I struggled on for over a year. I had a baby and managed to meet lots of deadlines at work. Right now this has really knocked my confidence.

I also get waves of anxiety, like the last hour or so I have been running around like a maniac!

Hi Pegscat and needtogetbetter,

I am absolutely the same...totally over doer and thinker for that matter. Just want everything to be perfect for my boys all the time...they are actually a bit spoiled :/ I give them everything the could possible want and I don't just mean material things...they ask...they most likely get!

I am the same with helping others...people tell me all the time I just need to say NO, but I find that so hard to do. Then when I am feeling like I am now, I almost feel like I have been a speeding train and bam...it stops!

It must be a common this with anxiety peoples, lol!

Needtogetbetter, please seek help now. You don't need to go on suffering. Sending massive hugs! Next time to post a message I want to hear that you at lease have an appointment ;) :) x x x

It's 4.48 and I have been up for 2 hours. Can't sleep.

Awe pegscat, nothing worse than lying awake in bed 😖😖 I hate it.

I'm on the other side of the world of you need to message me through the night 😊

Sorry to see the recent posters who've been struggling.

I wonder if it's a full moon or something, as having had two weeks respite I've been having horrific panic attacks since Sunday. All ok family wise (touch wood), just had a really positive annual review at work, have acquired some freelance work which will help pay for Christmas and lots of fun stuff with friends and family over the next month, so no idea why.

I am sure it stems from the recent bereavement and my issues around getting older. Think I could do with some more counselling but reluctant to ask GP as I only finished the last lot about a year ago .

Has anyone here tried diazepam for panic attacks? A couple of friends have recommended it, and I've always been dubious, but my mum had to take some for a medical procedure last week and the effect on her was very positive.

I always try to cover up the fact I'm having panic attacks which is really when hyperventilating! Would be good to have something to take the edge off when I'm really struggling.

Hope everyone else had a better night and feels more positive asap .

Hello, can I join you all.

I have only ever suffered with anxiety twice in my life. 15 years ago when I had DD and ended up with PND. It mainly manifested as acute anxiety, feelings of doom and dread, underlying panic and total inability to cope with 'anything' let alone a newborn. But with the help of very supportive in-laws and lovely DH (and ADs) I made a full recovery. I was perfectly well for the next 10 years.

Then 5 years ago life started to get super stressful. Lots of nasty, draining life events. Caring for frail inlaws. Serious money worries thanks to a lengthy court case. At one point it looked like we were going to lose our lovely home. Then DH went and injured himself playing sport, and was invalided for months so I had to do everything. And there were so many very dark, depressing days and weekends spent worrying about money, worrying about in-laws, worrying about losing our home.

But I was keeping my head above water and dealing with it. Then 2 years ago, out of the blue, the Anxiety Demon strolled back into my life. It was just horrible. I was right back in the same dark place I had been in when I had PND, except no baby to take care of this time. Irrational anxiety, feelings of dread, underlying panic all the time and couldn't cope with anything at all. Then I started getting random insomnia which was horrible.

At the same time my periods started to disappear. Still regular but barely there anymore. So I guessed my hormones might be to blame again, just like when I had PND years ago. Also I could regularly get several days in a row, or even two whole weeks, when the anxiety and depression would virtually disappear, but it always came back. So another reason to think it was hormonally related.

I saw my GP and then went to a menopause clinic. Tried HRT which didn't help. Then tried the BCP. Didn't really help either.

This week I finally caved in and started Mirtrazapine. I hate, hate, hate taking ADs but I was just desperate to feel better (felt so low and anxious last weekend that it scared me and poor DH, could barely speak or even get dressed).

It's very early days yet, but it seems to be helping already. My mood has lightened and anxiety only in the background. But it feels a very, very fragile state of mind. I am terrified of feeling as dreadful again as I did last weekend and terrified this anxiety and depression is going to be ongoing for years and years until I am post menopause (I am only 45 still). It has already stolen 2 years of my life, I don't want it to steal anymore.

Looking forward to giving and getting some support and advice on here.

pennypinkington could you be waking in the early hours feeling panicky because your blood sugar is low? If you eat your evening meal at say, 6pm, then you are going 7-8 hours without food. You were probably fine doing that when you were younger, but now the low sugar can wake you with anxiety surges.

Try having a non sugary snack at bedtime, just some toast or a banana and see if that helps.

need I was diagnosed with PND 15 years ago. I suffered identical symptoms to you (except I didn't bond with my baby for the first 6 months, sadly) so I really think you have PND too.

Please see your GP. I took ADs and they really helped me get back on my feet after just 3-4 weeks of taking them. I didn't feel happy exactly, but felt calmer and able to deal with life again.

You deserve to feel better than this xxc

Hello
I need some support too. I had a breakdown last June. As I work in education I was on sick leave until July ad then I was off for the summer holidays. I have 2 jobs. One with the local authority and the other owning my own preschool.
I was coping really well recently until last week. Something happened at the preschool which made me really worried about a child and triggered my anxiety. Because I was consumed with thoughts and worry about this child I made a phone call during a staff meeting when I was not involved in the discussion to get some information to pass onto to someone in my office who was working with the family. This meant that the child is now being monitored to ensure their welfare. However my line manager was not happy about the phone call as it was to my private business. Even after I explained why I made it she was still not happy. I feel awful and can't stop thinking about it. I know I was stupid and from her point of view I blatantly disrespected her and behaved inappropriately. My self esteem is so wrapped up in how others view me especially at work. She sort the advice of the head of our team before speaking to me and so now they know to.
She told me to put it behind me but I can't.
I feel stupid for reacting this way, stupid for what I did. I can't function because the thoughts keep swimming around my head. I can't get out of bed and face the world. My children are glued to screens because I haven't got the energy to get them off. I feel such a failure and pathetic for feeling sorry for myself.

Hi CowardlyLyon thank you for your post and I am sorry you are experiencing anxiety again

I am pre-menopause, 41 yo and have experienced panic attacks and anxiety for the past year. My GP prescribed sertraline this week and I am on day 4 of taking them.

Thank you for your suggestion regarding low blood sugar, it's something I hadn't really thought about - if anything I should be eating less

Charliesweb your work situation will settle down, you did the right thing, but I know it's hard to stop thinking about it and replaying it in your mind. Sounds like you've got a lot on your plate - you're not pathetic or a failure at all

Thank you for starting this thread and well done to the people brave enough to post on it. Including myself as it's the first step to making some changes.