How can I chill about Christmas

[Jackie2kids]

The past 2 Xmases have been hard work to the point of me having constant throbbing headaches and being irritable all the time. I don't want this to happen this year. My kids are 3 and 20mnths and poor sleepers so I know I will be tierd. Also we have a buisy schedule of 4 different house guests coming at different times (over lapping on the big day) over the 2 weeks plus going to stay with in laws for boxing day night. I am at work (mornings) the week before and between Xmas and NY. We live in a small 2 bed bungalow so space (and peace) is at a premium.Any ideas?

HI Jackie,

Write a plan of action - a goal for each visitor or day.

Plan any meals or catering to be as easy as possible.

Ask your visitors to contribute to meals - desserts or coked sides of ham and turkey etc.

Focus on it being a child friendly Christmas, do one or two small things towards being ready for things, and tick them off your action plan - so you can feel better about things.

Keep a small stash of whateve makes you feel good to one side - hidden if you must and go and treat yourself to a nibble or sip whenever it's all getting too much.

Chrsitmas is a time for family but you are included in that family so take it easy and dont be scared to ask for help or lay down rules that make sure you have a good day too!

good luck!

can you pre-cook and freeze as much as possible to reduce cooking time (also get ready made where you can - mince pies etc). Accept people's offers of help and don't feel bad - so feel free to say "you dads are off to walk the kids and I'm going to do the washing up - xxx will you help me or do you want to go for a walk with the boys?"

Give DH specific jobs, but be specific - "DH your job is to clear the table after the meals, including clearing the plates and stacking them by the sink/in the dishwasher"

Get paper napkins/tablecloths and bin em. Life is short.

On boxing day night ignore all above. You're the guest, enjoy it, focus on the kids. If the in laws want help they can ask their child. OR volunteer for one smallish task (laying table, making dessert) and say with a smile "shall I do X as otherwise I'll be completely taken up with the kids"

and let it go otherwise. its 2 weeks of your life, your choice to enjoy or not. the only people you are responsible for are the kids, everyone else will get on wit things themselves.

Thank you for your lovely calming advice. I will definately try to write a plan etc and deligate jobs as last year didn't plan at all and always seemed to be playing catch up. All my visitors are lovely people thankfully (no scarey MIL). I also like the idea of prioritorising the kids so as long as I know they are fed when they need to be and get naps etc, the others can look after themselves re snacks and drinks and maybe DH can do meals as he likes to cook Xmas Dinner. MIL can wash up as she likes to help. Its all sounding better already. Last year I was so stressed out that I spoilt it for everyone else. J