Stress - hoping to be signed off.

[MrsMorgan1990]

Hello, this is my first ever post to mumsnet so I hope it goes okay!

So I'm 25 and I have two children. I work part time roughly 30 hours a week max and I do love my job. The people are nice, most of the staff are okay and I can kind of talk to my general manager about most things.

However life was good until a few weeks ago. Our landlord dropped the bombshell that he was selling our home after we've rented here for 7 years and brought up both children here, it feels like forever. So our landlord is horrible anyway and always has been a pain. We've fixed everything and sorted problems and paid for it because he's utterly useless!!! He's given us the money back but it takes a good month normally!

Anyway he gave us 2 months notice to move out right before xmas and I've just stepped down from management roll so my wages are half what they were :( also hubby was signed off with a bad shoulder for 3 weeks so his pay was less than normal then for this to hit us it was like a final nail in the coffin! We've been searching for a few weeks and it's been stressful. We found places but they'd be gone before we got them, some weren't suitable and most were well over our budget. So now we're moving to a completely different area, only 15 mins drive down the road so not bad but it means moving my daughter schools, my son pre school and myself trying to get a job transfer or a new job...

As if this isn't bad enough we've been told that the 2 out of 3 school places we applied for were full so we're on a list and then she may get put in a school further away which they "could" provide transport for although we aren't on any benefits so I don't hold out much hope. Trying to fit in visits, viewings for measuring up and working with two children when my husband works 60 hours a week is draining. Along with trying to declutter and pack everything, organise moving and the arguments at home are awful :( it's so stressful and upsetting and my daughter hasn't ever had issues at school yet last week she got a letter home for having too many warnings in one day :'( I feel so responsible for it. Plus trying to find £2000 for fees, deposit and rent in a matter of weeks is crazy!!! As well as the fact our rent had been cheap we are now looking at a £200 increase a month... this along with depression creeping back in is really starting to drag me down. I feel like I'm underwater and constantly being pushed down and drowned and every time I manage to get up for air I sink even further in. It's physically and mentally draining. I'm calling my GP today and hoping that they'll get me signed off for a few weeks so I can pull myself together. More than anything so I can just stop and breathe. The thing that's the worst is having a timescale passing you by day by day and trying to sort it out and waiting around for admissions and moving dates and everything.

Any advice or support would be much appreciated!

Gosh you have a lot on your plate :(

Is there any mileage in signing on with local authority and or housing association? Especially as your income has dropped? you may well qualify but its a long shot and obviously depends on the area. I live in a road with half owned and half council housing, we own our own house but id be happy if it were one of the council houses as its an old, established road with mostly old families etc (no groups of kids hanging around). Other areas i'd be unhappy. Even if you can't get anything now, maybe this would be worthwhile long term as your tenancy is as secure as it gets.

Is your Landlord in breach of contract at all? 2 months notice doesn't seem long? Can you find out?

can you leave hubby in charge of all of that? as he his home?

it does sound like you need some time to regroup.

Bless you, what a lot of stressful stuff going on.

I think this is a crisis time and you absolutely need some time off to get sorted.

As for school transport, it doesn't matter that you are not on benefits. If the school they allocate is over 2 miles away (primary school) they will provide transport.

Bless you though, hope things get settled really quickly and back to normal.

Thank you both TheoriginalLEM and Alfieisnoisy for a quick and lovely response. I have an appointment at 2pm with a male doctor which I'm a bit uneasy about but it was the only one left today and I know it'll be a huge weight off my mind.

I have signed on with the local authority but we live in a very popular market town that's in the Midlands and lots of business people live here to commute to London so I know a lot of people on the housing list get located to little villages as theres no space here but they're a lot further away for hubby to get to work so it wouldn't be an option really. Plus I don't want to move my daughter schools now and then again in a few years so we're saving after Xmas for a mortgage and father in law is helping with that so where we are moving to is where we'll buy hopefully.

My income has dropped but hubby earns a lot well they class it as a lot but when he pays all our bills and rent it's pretty much gone and mine covers food shop and fuel for car.

Our tenancy started as a fixed one then just rolls month by month so 2 months is all he legally needs to give which just sucks because it's so close to xmas! Hubby in charge of what?

The school transport is a relief that's good to know.

As I'm writing this my "lovely" landlord has text me. I hate that man. We called him on Friday to inform him we'd found somewhere but we were waiting on application to go through so I wrote a letter with all information and posted on Sunday afternoon. However he's telling me now that he'll only count it from the date he receives the letter. He is quite happy to screw us over at every chance he gets. We aren't meant to go until Nov and we're leaving before hand on 10th Oct which means he can lay a new carpet and decorate a few bits he wants to make it appeal more for a sale which is helpful yet he continues to treat us like shit. He's telling me the full month of rent needs to be paid so instead of us paying just 2 weeks worth to cover us upto the end of the month notice which will be end of Oct he expects a full month to cover up to mid Nov when we'll be gone by 17th Oct latest!

So very fed up...

Is your deposit in a protected scheme?

Tell him to do one! if he wants you out two weeks before the end of the contract just so he can fit carpets then you don't have to pay those two weeks rent!

I hope that you got on well at the Drs.

Hello - firstly yes our deposit is in a protected scheme.

He doesn't want us out. Basically he served us a 2 month notice which he is entitled to do and that means we have to go by the end of Nov. We have however found a place so we are moving in on the 10th Oct. This happens to be when our rent is next due so instead of paying from Oct to the 10th Nov we are only paying up until when our notice expires which is the 30th Oct.

He's telling us though that down to the contact that states we need to pay fully up until Nov. He had the cheek to change the dates last night to say we had to pay from the 1st of Oct a full month to the end (even though in the past 5 years our rent has never been paid at the start of the month always middle of) then he said we need to pay up until mid Nov which would be £300 on top of our full monthly rent for Oct! He makes it up as he goes along!!!

He then tried to be a "nice guy" and say if we paid the full rent he'd not worry about the £300 in Nov. However even if we went by the contract we'd just pay from mid Oct to Nov a full month and we'd be gone instead of paying £546 for Oct then an additional £300 for a few weeks in Nov.

My only issue is the fact that our contract is 6 years old and it was originally for a lower amount of rent and for 6 months. So because our rents increased etc is the original contact even still valid.

I didn't get to the doctors because of all this constant crap with landlord and I'vex just not even left the house unless I've had to :( I've rebooked for later this evening. Will keep you posted :) thanks xxx

This all sounds very stressful for you

If you can I would ring up or go to your local Citizens' Avvice Bureau with a copy of your contract, the notice he gave you and any other correspondence you have had with him about this. There are very specific legal requirements around giving notice and the dates it has to be done on and (I'm definetely no expert!) he may not have followed this which could give you some leverage to negotiate with him about your leaving date. Even if not you may feel better for getting some advice and knowing your position. Good luck!