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Please talk to me about sertraline

3 replies

WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 27/09/2015 10:56

I know there's loads of people here who have a lot of knowledge about this, hope you can help.
I lost my husband in February, he was fit and well and died suddenly of a brain haemorrhage. We'd been married nearly 25 years. I am 46 and have 2 grown children. I've always been a happy, optimistic type but my GP put me on sertraline as I was really struggling (understandably). I feel like I am coping from day to day, I went back to work in April and I've had a couple of nice holidays with my DS who's still at home (doing A levels) but I do get very down sometimes- at weekends when I'm home alone and when the weather is bad.
So I don't know what normal is. I've never been on ADs before. I don't know how I'd be without them. Is it the sertraline that's helping me cope or would I be okay with it it? When do I come off them or reduce the dose? I'm on 100mg at the moment, started on 50 but the doctor increased it.
Thank you for reading Smile

OP posts:
NanaNina · 27/09/2015 13:36

As you say it is very understandable that you are struggling after the untimely death of your DH. The thing about feeling low and clinical depression is a tricky one. I can only tell you my own experiences. I lost my best and closest friend to ovarian cancer (when we were both 46 as it happened) and I was off work for a month with what I thought was depression, crying bouts, only wanting to talk about her and the illness/death, would suddenly remember something we'd done together/or something funny and would start to cry (this would happen in the car sometimes and I'd have to pull over) I went back to work after a month and that was tough because we worked together too, and of course everyone wanted to know how her DH was and the 3 children she left.

I seemed to be more or less ok though still sad, but then 6 months after my friend died I had an episode of severe depression - built up very quickly - started with physical symptoms - feeling dizzy (all the time) suicidal thoughts, scared stiff of how I was feeling, long bouts of crying, just awful - never felt like that before. It got worse and I ended up in a psychiatric hospital for 3 months and on medication. I made a complete recovery and was on the meds for 15 years and no more problems.

I then started to come off the meds very gradually and 4 months after I'd come off them, I relapsed and was back in hospital for 3 months and haven't made a complete recovery this time (5 years ago) and have tried several different ADs. I'm on Sertraline 150mg at the moment with others added in. Bit I'm 71 and apparently it's harder to make a complete recovery when you're older.

SO all I can say is clinical depression is very different from "feeling low" - and usually makes you feel empty, flat, totally unmotivated, lack of interest, numb, almost an absence of any emotion. Mostly we want to withdraw from life - hide under the duvet - don't want to see people, feel scared, have suicidal thoughts and even think of ways of committing suicide. IF you have any of those symptoms I think you need to stay on the meds, but the trouble is, the only way you will know whether you need them to stay on an even keel is if you stop taking them and then go downhill. It's all trial and error with ADs I'm afraid. For some reason people don't like being on ADs but I learned the hard way and I'm sure if I'd stayed on them I wouldn't have relapsed. Anyway you can't have been on them for very long, so I think the best thing is to stay on them for the time being - especially through the winter and you are having to face a lot of "firsts" without your DH.

GPs in my experience aren't very clued up about meds or how/when to come off them - but they need to be reduced very gradually, but don't be in a rush to come off them.

Have you had any bereavement counselling - I didn't and wish I had, as I think it might have saved me from depression, but of course I'll never know about that. My friend has been dead for 21 years and I still miss her and can cry about her at times.

WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 27/09/2015 18:09

Thank you so much for your advice nina, sorry I haven't been back to the thread earlier, I actually been to a service of thanksgiving for the families of organ donors this afternoon, it was very draining.
My doctor has been very kind, I haven't asked her yet about coming off them. I not sure if I should be taking them for months or years... You are spot on about the 'firsts' so I won't think about stopping them yet. I don't mind being on them, or telling people that I am. I think I bypass any stigma by being recently widowed.

I'm sure that I don't have clinical depression, But I do also have anxiety, stress and panic attacks.
I had a course of 12 sessions of bereavement counselling provided by my employer. I still can't decide just how I feel about the experience. I found it stressful and exhausting at times and soothing at others.

OP posts:
NanaNina · 27/09/2015 19:08

Hello again - as I'm sure you know the meds deal with the symptoms of depression, but not the underlying cause. Loss (not necessarily bereavement) is at the root of most depressive illness. Anxiety is the medical term for fear, and panic is fear plus plus, if that makes sense. In mental illness it isn't usually possible to say what we are afraid of - for me, it's fear of fear, fear of feeling like I want to disappear. But anxiety and depression do go hand in hand, and it often isn't easy to tell one from the other.

Counselling is very exhausting and I hope the counsellor warned you about this.....and you will of course experience a range of emotions, some positive, some negative, but I do think on balance it is best to have bereavement counselling, and wish I'd had it after my bereavement. Thinking about it I did have 6 sessions (paid for by my employer) like you but in the middle of a working day and so they weren't much good.

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