How do you know if your 6yo has depression?

[caitlinohara]

I'm concerned about ds2 and not sure what to do. He has always had a tendency to be 'gloomy' for no reason and seemingly out of the blue, but this is getting worse as he gets older. He doesn't like school, but hasn't enjoyed being at home over the summer either, so I don't think it is as simple as that. When I try to talk to him he doesn't seem able to articulate what's wrong - but at 6 and a half I'm not sure that that's unusual. Can a 6 year old even HAVE depression? Do I just wait it out and see what happens or should I be pursuing this? His behaviour is becoming more and more challenging at home - my mum says it's like having a teenager around!

I should point out that I am alert to this because Dh's family has a history of mental illness - his uncle is severely bi-polar and his grandmother and great grandmother both suffered from depression, eating disorders and hypochondria. I am torn between wanting to help him by 'catching it early' (is that even a thing with depression?) and not wanting to create something that isn't there.

Does anyone on here have any experience of this or any of you adults living with depression, can you pinpoint when it began?

You go and see a psychologist I suppose.

My friends ds sees a psychologist every week and has done since he was about eight. My friend doesn't known what they talk about as the psychologist isn't allowed to discuss it with her.

He started taking anti-depressants when he was ten.

You should definitely not ignore this. Does the school have a Family Support Advisor? They can help with who to contact. Also talk to your GP. Or talk to Mind, they can probably guide you in the right direction. www.mind.org.uk/

I think it's extremely unlikely that your son has depression but I'm no medic - it's just that it seems very young. Can you say more about him - does he have times when he's happy - does he have friends - what do the school say about him. What are his interests? How long have you noticed this - sorry for all the Qs - just trying to get more or a picture. I have a DGS who is grumpy a lot of the time, (he's 10 now) but it's usually if he can't get his own way.

AS far as hereditary conditions are concerned - the psychotic illnesses (like bipolar) can be inherited but not depression, EDs or hypochondria.

Your GP could refer your son to CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service) but there is usually a long wait and the help they can give in my experience is limited. There are clinical psychologists specialising in childhood problems but you'd have to pay. There is also play therapy (which I think is the best thing for a child of his age) and the therapist would give you some ideas on how to help your son, but again you'd have to pay, so don't know if this is an option.

I don't think you can "catch it early" to be honest if indeed there is anything seriously wrong. Sometimes it's a case of waiting to see how the child develops - just wondering does he have behaviour problems and whether you've thought of the possibility of him being on the autistic spectrum.

Thanks. I feel like I am going round in circles between thinking I should address the issue, and not wanting to start labelling him and therefore potentially drawing attention to it.

In answer to questions: He claims not to have any friends and certainly he finds friendships difficult to sustain. All the friends he has had he has fallen out with, I suspect partly because of his moodiness. Certainly the party invitations have dried up over the last year. He is interested in music and dancing but not in a formal way - he doesn't want to do dance classes of any kind and gave up learning an instrument because he wouldn't practise. Yes not getting his own way is a definite trigger but often it's nothing you can pinpoint - he just gets into a negative spiral that he can't get out of. I think to some degree he has always been like this but it's been worse over the last twelve months.

I am going to see how he gets on in his new school year and see whether that makes any difference, but if not I will try mind. Thanks x

School might be able to help, and can refer on as well if necessary. Just as an aside really, but i wondered if there are autistic spectrum conditions in the family? It was actually the descriptions of the female family members - nowadays those 3 'symptoms' might be part of how asd can present in women.

If you look on Mumsnet's own advice page on child mental health they recommend (as do I) Young Minds who can give direct advice on their parent helpline today:

www.youngminds.org.uk

Hi, I read a news article a few days on the train about a 4 year old who was depressed (apparently since birth). Turned out to be a physical problem which was sorted with some tablets - was like a different child after. Sorry, I don't remember more other than the child was showing all the signs of being depressed. I would get DS checked out by GP for physical health first may be.