For the past year or so, I've been unhappy. It started as a niggling unrest but is now a constant sense of unhappiness. I've always been a happy positive person so I don't understand where this is coming from.
I have the daughter I've always wanted (was infertile for a while), achieved a particular rather wonderful dream I've always coveted, have a wonderful family and friends and a good husband.
Yes, I'm tired but what working parent isn't?
When I'm doing things that ought to make me happy, I feel I'm watching from outside, dispassionate. I feel numb around my husband, no sexual attraction or interest in him. I've even considered leaving him. I look at other people's lives and think they seem happier / better than me. These are such alien feelings to me!
I've been wondering whether it's simply that I'm not happy in my marriage but then it seems to cloud everything, not just that.
Is it depression? If so, I don't want to go to the GP and get prescribed some pills. I could see a therapist but it's so expensive and does it really work?
I need help, that's clear. Has anyone been through this? What can I do? I even feel dispassionate writing this?