Always feeling guilty and dwelling on things and feeling extremely low

[sammyjayneex]

I am always dwelling on things and feeling guilty all the time. I feel very low today. Cant even laugh or smile I feel that low. This morning my children woke up as always and they are always happy play once they get up and sometimes I lay in. This morning I just didn't want to get up and I don't know why. My 9 year old asked if they could go down and she would give them their breakfast and I agreed (she has done this previously in the past as her dad used to allow her to allow her some independence. But now I feel really guilty that I didn't get up and do it and feel like I have neglected them. Then I start to worry and think what happens if my mind went blank and I didn't get up at all and just left them all day to fend for themselves. This has never happened before and I worried what's happening to me. I have been ill the past few days to be fair (getting over a cold) but im dwelling on this morning and feel guilty. Since getting up I have done everything I should have done today, made them lunch and tea ect but I thin k I only got up eventually because my daughter needed help on te toilet (shes 3)

Am I a bad mother. Just scared about what is happening to me.

No you're not a bad Mother. I was the eldest of 5... Being close together in age we regularly got yo early before the parents - yes at 9... I'm sure she is responsible enough to pour some cereal and to alert you if there is a problem. I'm pretty sure you would have been listening in on events and would have known if something were wrong. Please don't stress.

I agree, you are absolutely not a bad mother and the fact that you have written this is testament to that. You sound like a very caring mother who perhaps is going through a tricky time and feeling low. It can be very difficult to deal with this when you've got little'uns to think about too. I agree with gemsparkle, and perhaps your 9 year old enjoyed the responsibility!

I just keep playing it in my mind and dwelling on it. What if I don't get out of bed one morning and neglect them. I don't want this to happen. I'm just scared.