got an appointment for counselling on tuesday

[alexa1]

i had the letter through this morning. i don't know whether to go or not. i don't know what to expect. Another thing is, it says on the letter that there will be a student present for training purposes and the college they are training is where i go. Not that i know every single person at college but what if they recognise me or i know them. there are some girls on my access course that are doing counselling for social work.
i know i'm being paranoid and the chances are slim but i don't want anyone to know i am having conselling, not even my family. my DH knows but that's it.
i also don't know what to expect from it. what can they do for me. for those of u that don't me, I suffer with panic attacks and anxiety especially in social situations.

alexa..that's great...i have posted at length about the benefits of counselling and will try and find the link......! if it is someone you know, which is unlikely...they will be bound by confidentality not to tell...if they are that indiscreet, unlikely to be doing a counselling course..IFYSWIM..

Alexa - they will talk to you about confidentiality when you get there. I work for a counselling service (not as a counsellor) and I can tell you that confidentiality is covered very strictly. The trainees will be expected to abide by the same strict rules as the counsellors. At the first session, you may not cover too much ground, as the counsellor will firstly draw up a 'contract' with you. You will not be pushed into talking about anything you don't want to. If, for whatever reason after going, you don't feel comfortable with the counsellor or the setup, you should be offered someone else. The chemistry has to be right for counselling to be effective. Counselling cannot work miracles, you have to work with it, but a good counsellor can help you identify areas of your life which you might want to change and help change the way you percieve things. At my service, people can ring up at any stage with any questions they might have about counselling. Is there a service co-ordinator you can talk to about what to expect?
Why not give it a go and see? Good luck x

hi alexa - I agree with lulumama that if it does turn out to be someone you know then they will abide by the rules of confidentiality - however I am guessing that whether they tell anyone else or not, you prob just don't want them to know. So how about giving them a ring to ask for the name of the student who will be present? Also if you really don't want a student present, I can't see why the counsellor can't still see you - would be rather unfair to turn you down for counselling on that basis.

As for what to expect - you will be able to talk about anything you want, and will not be pushed into anything. Fullmoonfiend makes a great point about "chemistry" - if you have things you want to say but don't feel comfortable with the counsellor, then see someone else. I hope that it's a good experience for you. x

You can't be forced to have a student present. Phone in advance and say so, giving your reasons.

thanks girls. i might phone in advance and ask for a student not to be present. i appreciate they have to learn and everything but i don't feel comfortable knowing it could be someone from the college i attend.

that's completely understandable and if the service is worth its salt, your wishes should be respected.

When I attended my first councelling session last year it turned out that the councellor I saw was someone who lived very close to me and I often said a brief hello to in the street as she spoke to my kids etc- I had no idea before then that that's what she did for a living though and so was v suprised to walk into the room and find her sitting there. We had quite a long chat about how comfortable I was with the situation. I decided to give it a try and it was fine- there were topics I felt a little uneasy in discussing but she was well aware that that may be the case and really helpped to put me at ease. I had huge reservations about going in the first place even though it had become v obvious I needed to talk to someone- I'm not a very good comunicater on a personal level and so had no idea what to expect, I now highly recommend it and am considering going back for more!

Bootsie - That's what i dread. Someone that knows me sitting there.
Glad u found it useful though.

Alexa, please go!

I had my first counselling appointment on Friday morning. Was so anxious, had an upset tummy before I went. Dispite getting upset during the session, left feeling hugely optimistic that someone is there to listen and that with their help, I will get things clearer in my mind.

It's very worthwhile. Please do go and just take it one step at a time. You can always ask for someone else- I know I probably will next time as I do wonder whether the issues that still bother me are the things I skirted round a little with the 1st lady I saw. I was willing to use any excuse not to go the first (and 2nd!) time and like Emmylou made myself ill with worry but kept at it- it's great to talk and not feel judged, and has helped me to see through some difficult problems and given me the courage to try to be more open with people about the way I feel in certain situations. Best wishes x

Message withdrawn

Quite right Dior...I'd agree with that

Alexa1? Did you go? How did it go?

thanks for asking fullmoonfield but i'm such a stupid prat, i got the date wrong.
i got ready and got in the car to go to the appt, i so happen to look at the address of the place again and noticed the date is for next tuesday.
i was glad as i have got a lot on this week and feel extremely stressed.

The first session with a counsellor does feel very daunting, but it gets easier & easier as time goes on.
I have had lots of counselling (am on the waiting list to go back for more!) & found it really helpful.
Your counsellor will keep everything 100% confidential - they don't even discuss anything with your gp.
I found the first two or three sessions the hardest, as you are having to open up to someone new, but it does get easier & easier with every session.
I have found that I kind of understand myself as a person lots more since seeing my counsellor, if that makes any sense!
If you don't want a student present, then they cannot force you. They should ask you if you are ok with it first.

Good luck, I hope your sessions prove to be helpful.