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Does anyone have an adult sibling with Asperger's syndrome?

7 replies

nigelslaterfan · 01/07/2015 10:28

I have a sibling whose condition appears to be getting worse as she gets older, is that common?

OP posts:
fluffybunnies246 · 01/07/2015 12:58

Sorry, I don't have a sibling but I have worked with adults with Asperger's syndrome/Autism in a professional capacity.

My experience (which may differ from other people's) was the people I worked with gained coping skills through adolescence/adulthood but then we were working in a supportive/enabling environment.

I worked with an autistic gentleman whose symptoms got worse as he was getting to pension age, and not able to communicate so it is difficult to work out exactly what was going on for him, apart from he clearly was not happy.

I am aware that sometimes symptoms get worse due to other factors rather than age- anxiety, depression, isolation, changes in routine. Has your sister mentioned being anything worrying her particularly? You didn't mention your sister's age?

Mitzyme · 01/07/2015 13:12

Hi op, my brother ( 50 ) was diagnosed officially 2yrs ago at the adult with autism centre. Family always suspected but had to wait until our parents died before we could do anything.
I think the strain of coping in society is getting more of a struggle for DB as his coping strategy is remembering what he perceives as normal.
I do think this must be burning him out tho' and can certainly see his memory worsening.
I just wish he would put down the burden of trying to be his version of normal.
I don't really know who he really is or what he really thinks. Sad isn't it.
Perhaps get in touch with the local adult with Autism team, they explained things so much better than me. I accessed this via GP.

nigelslaterfan · 01/07/2015 14:01

thank you, I don't want to put many details in case my sibling is on this page, it's quite possible.

Suffice to say they have cut themselves off from their family after taking offence at who knows what. They have their own family; but it's very painful for everyone to see the effect on parents of being cut off.

i wondered if cutting off family was common or a known behaviour?

OP posts:
fluffybunnies246 · 01/07/2015 17:48

the person I worked closely with for years would cut people close to them off. Most people with AS can't work out how this would effect other people though- it needs to be politely pointed out. Has this happened? Although there were people my client AS barely spoke to for long periods they still felt fondness for the person and appreciated contact. Unfortunately, as you will know you have to give a lot more than you get back- which is easier if you are operating in a work capacity than if it is your own family. It must be very hard for you all.

nigelslaterfan · 02/07/2015 09:17

It is so sad for the parent as there's a grandchild who is growing up without any contact at the moment.

But the sibling is so sensitive that almost anything can create extreme offence, contact is a minefield, the slightest comment can just explode. It's really awful.

OP posts:
buttonmoonboots · 04/07/2015 11:07

I don't have a sibling with AS. I do know someone with AS who cut contact with their family for reasons I don't understand but I believe it was because they felt there was no understanding of their condition and found it stressful trying to have relationships with them.

I'm sorry, I don't know what to suggest.

nigelslaterfan · 05/07/2015 00:17

Thank you. I think we are just going to stay in touch and hope that time helps rebuild relationships.

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