Post-suicidal crisis (obviously content could be upsetting)

[Smartleatherbag]

Just need some reassurance really. Been through another suicide plan etc, didn't do it, never have yet. Intent gone now. I find it comforting to know it's an option. I am safe, and will keep myself safe, no problem there. I have support.
What I need is some reassurance - I feel so exhausted, like completely drained - during and now, several days after. Is this normal? I have anxieties about my health so being physically floored really panics me

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I'm sorry you've been through such a difficult time . In my experience, emotional upset has a direct knock-on effect of overpowering fatigue. Being distraught uses up a huge amount of energy.

Thanks Saturn, I appreciate your reply . I know you're right, it is helpful to hear it!

Hi Smart - I could have written your OP myself! I totally understand where you're coming from and yes, the draining feeling and exhaustion sound about right to me. I have often thought that the planning you describe is a way of regaining control over your life and what happens to you - when everything around me seems overwhelming, it is indeed comforting to know that other options exist, even incredibly final ones. Often just having that plan in place is as far as you need to go to realise that it's not the solution you want, and the enormity of this realisation can leave you mentally drained, which in turn feels like physical exhaustion.

Are you feeling any better today? Small, nourishing meals, plenty of sleep, no alcohol and being with people who care about you - as well as being kind to yourself - will all help.

Hi lobster, thanks for your post, very helpful. Best wishes to you too x

Hi smart, I'm off work with what my GP has kindly called 'post viral fatigue' after a particularly down and stressful period where I tried to just cope and carry on. I'm feeling totally depleted and although I didn't have suicidal ideation, I did want to do something dramatic like running away from DH and DS.
I think that kind of stress is enormously physically exhausting and often demand some recuperation time. Are you sleeping? Do you have space and time for some things that are restorative? I'm craving nature so going on a walk in the countryside every day.

Hi geek, thanks, yeah I totally know what you mean about nature. I live in the country side and am walking a lot! It really helps, you're right. I hope you are getting better .
I feel a bit better than when I started this thread. Still fragile and I'd love some time off but I was off half of last year (!!!) having never needed more than the odd vomiting bug day off, ever, before then. I can't take more time off really but work are really good and help take the pressure off a lot. I find everything so hard and I'm so weary.