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can i just talk to you about stuff going through my mind atm....im so deflated :-(

4 replies

biglips · 27/05/2015 08:51

I try and not to waffle on too much....

I turned 40 last year and even though 40 is just a number, I feel so unhappy about it. As I thought, i've done nothing with my non-existing life and am I gonna be like this for the next 40 years...don't think so!.

I've got a fab husband who I've been with for 15 yrs and married for 2 yrs, 3 lovely good kids, age 2, 6 & 10. I've got myself a small part time job twice a week, 2 months ago, after being a SAHM for 10 yrs and I love it, but I could do with more hours - more money. I've got 2 good friends but both work full time and have their own friends as well, so I speak to them every couple of weeks (they are 2 separate friends).

BUT I'm so lonely as I'm living in the area that is not my hometown but it's my husbands. Our financial side is awful as my husbands is self employed for the past 8 yrs with an asshole business partner but the money is not a steady income and not enough for both of them to live on. (thanks god for the benefits as I totally rely on them to pay our bills etc). ive checked everything that we are entitled to.

me and husbands were arguing a lot last year and nearly ended up splitting up through me being frustrated with him being moody coming home from work and banging on about his crappy business partner. (However, my husband had been offered a salesman job through a good friend of his (which is my boss's son) in the next 4 months and the money is steady).

We desperately need to sort out our finance so we are so behind on the mortgage and a few bills. My wage covered nearly half of the mortgage.
our house is falling apart around us (there were my mums words...that really hurts me a lot).

Last time I had slept like a baby and woke up feeling fresh was before he became self employed.

ive started to try nytol to help me sleep as I do have purple rings under my eyes and ive got a stress rash/spots that its not going away with screams prescribed from the docs...im so fuckin exhausted!! and ready to cry every minute.

I would love to find new friends but its hard. My family doesn't bother with me as i don't live in the same area as them (they live half an hour drive way from me!!)....im always going to them and none return.

Im wondering if I try anti-depressants tabs, I would start feeling abit better? ive tried counselling but ive got like millions of stuff to tell them in a very short space of time. :-(

I don't want ever my kids to go through what im going through...being permanently skint. as when I was growing up, my parents always had money and we went on holidays and had nice clothes, etc....but my husband's upbringing was very poor as his mum was a single parent, his dad wasn't around at the time and they literally had no foods in the house, etc..so different upbringing to mine.

I wanna look back in my life and say I did that and that was a laugh... but its all down to money...... ive got nothing to say :-( :-(

don't know what to do anymore....

thanks for my rambling post and your time xx

OP posts:
Nevergoingtolearn · 27/05/2015 09:39

I think a lot of us feel like this, I was in a similar situation, felt so lonely and unhappy, felt like my life was going nowhere, a month ago I split with dh in hope to make my life better, at the moment my life is so much worse, I have realised what I had and have now lost and I am even more lonely and skint.

Money isn't everything, there's a lot of exciting things you can do without having money ( though I know having money does help ).

Some people don't realise what they have until it's gone, you have 3 lovely children, a husband that loves you, you own your own home and you have 2 good friends, life might seem boring at times, I think it does for most people, we always want what we can't have and take for granted what we do have ( I have come to realise this over the past month ).

biglips · 27/05/2015 12:12

I'm sorry to hear about the probs youre going through atm.... Ive got no
intentions to split up as I cant wait for husband to come home so I can talk some adult convo. but we are at this present moment cant be bothered to make an effort to do anything together. I find when we have a little bit mire money in that week, we seem to be happier and got motivation atm my house is a mess too.
Ive just come back from the park with my ds but now I'm shattered .

OP posts:
biglips · 27/05/2015 19:04

My motivation wasnt there today as got loads to do in the house ie tidy up!

OP posts:
biglips · 27/05/2015 21:04

Plus money is everything to us at this present time, esp when I'm on the verge of losing my house and we are in alot of debts too. do wish we had a money tree to clear our debts

OP posts:
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