is this depression??

[lesley1417]

hi i have a 19 week old baby and a four year old.when i think back ive been feeling stressed and not quite myself since the four year olds birth.however in the last couple of months ive been quite nasty to her over silly things .i am aware im going over the top with shouting etc but feel unable to control myself. other things like washing hoovering are also getting to me.it seems to take me ages to get organised to doanything i seem to have no motivation .my baby cries a lot but i don't think this is just the problem.sometimes (3-4 times in last 2 weeks )ive started crying sometimes in public.my hv is aware of allthis and sent me to gp.hv suggested ads -gp reluctant as breastfeeding.however am i really depressed? i do feel stressed and anxious but im not sure.i know im not enjoying things quite as much.cant be bothered with xmas.also cant wait every day until childrens bed time.maybe im just not cut out to be a mum.please give me your opinion.thanks

Sounds like depression. It might solved without ADs though - your GP should be able to arrange seeing a psychologist for CBT? Did he meantion any therapy at all?

It does sound like depression to me-- drs now think that anxiety and depression are part of the same problem and both can be treated by ads. Am sure that you can get ads that you can take whilst bfeeding, worth googling?
Am sure you ARE cut out to be a mum, PND is very common and not something that suggests weakness or incompetence.
Also if the housework is stressing you out, what about getting a cleaner?

To answer your question I think 'yes'

I have suffered from depression and had a lot of simliar symptons - esp the anxiety. You are cut out to be a mum - it is a very stressful and tiring time and some people get depressed becuase of this - loads of us do. I got depressed but I am cut out to be a mum.

I think you should go to your GP he/she will go through a kind of checklist that will diagnose if you are depressed and how depressed. they may recommend some treatment. Have a think before you go if you are diagnosed what kind of treatmernt you would need (medication counselling etc.) and read up a bit or post for more info. In my exp. helps a bit to discuss options if you have had a chance to talk first.

Also recognising your symptons as you have is the first and often most difficult step. With help I got better and life is rosy again.

Good luck - ask more if you want.

Lots of love to you

lesley - that sounds very much like me at the start of this year. I asked the HV for help and talked to my GP. I told him I was wary of ADs and he referred me for therapy - I have really made a turnaround. It helped me so much. I hope you get the help you need - you do sound depressed tbh and dont feel like you are a bad mother. It is more common than you realise. xxx

Lesley, bells are ringing here (I had PND with both babies). Of course this is a knackering time, but I do believe that not feeling 'like yourself' and not enjoying things as much as you used to is a good indicator that you could do with some help and support.
Did the GP suggest counselling? Some people say that helps a lot (maybe you could ask to see a counsellor before you decide whether to go on ADs... but there might be a wait).
Counselling didn't make much difference to me, but ADs did (I was breastfeeding too, there are ADs that are fine if you are feeding, I was on dothiepin/dosulepin, other people try sertraline, your GP or HV should be able to give you some reassurance on this), and amazingly before too long I was actually enjoying my two.
I found the diagnosisa big relief, tbh. It made me realise that it wasn't my fault I was feeling like this.
Anyway, yes, I recognise almost everything you say as something I experienced when I was ill.

Lesley - firstly big hugs from me.

I don't know whether it's PND or not. The reason I say that is because I had very similar feelings to yours, but they were happening long before DS1 was born, but were exacerbated by motherhood.
My main feelings are lack of control, anxiousness and not enjoying the kids as much as I should (and losing my temper with DS1 quite a bit)
I was advised on here to go and see my GP, which I eventually did, and then I started on ADs about 3 weeks ago, and I had my first counselling session today. I am feeling much better already (although I know I still have a way to go), and I'm fer less short-tempered with the boys than I used to be.
Please don't think you're not cut out to me a mum - I have had those feelings too, but then when the DCs turn to you for comfort, you know you are, in fact, the best mum in the world, at least to them.