I don’t know why I am bothering, but I would like to try and figure out my ex. I think it’s something I need to do for the sake of our children.
We split up 6 months ago. I always knew there was something wrong in our relationship and always blamed myself. In the end, I had had enough.
As time is going on, I am thinking that he actually is mentally ill. I am trying to figure out what it is that makes him the way he is…and so perhaps I can understand his actions and hopefully develop the tools to deal with him.
I have spoken to a few people who know us, and they have come forward without prompting – saying they think he has been mentally ill for some time.
So if this is the case – how can I figure out what mental illness he has? There is no way he would see a doctor for diagnosis.
Maybe it would help if I wrote down his attitude / behaviour?
He will not listen to anyone else’s point of view, ever.
He believes he is right about everything, always.
Refuses to talk about serious things.
Takes over everything – from nights out to holidays.
He is belittling and condescending towards most people. In fact, all people.
He can’t hold down a job.
Does not want to conform.
Prone to depression.
Manipulative.
Claims to have been suicidal.
Refuses to get a permanent job.
Hates authority.
Wants to cheat the system.
He is very paranoid.
Lazy.
He is rude.
He is a misogynist .
He is selfish.
He hates crowds / socialising – he gets extremely nervous and sweaty, and will drink to get over the fear.
He sulks when he doesn’t get his own way.
He is antagonistic.
He puts his own needs in front of all else.
Maybe he is just an arsehole? I don’t know. I am musing I suppose. We have 2 young children together and for their sake I need to know how to deal with this very difficult man. I also need to know that our children are safe with him. Every time he takes them, I worry. But I don’t want to keep them from their father, either.
If anyone has any views / opinions on this please post…
TIA