I am such a mess

[CuppaBiccieBliss]

Today has been bloody awful. I have complex ptsd and spent most of last night in tears, scared to go to sleep because of nightmares. So today, I am exhausted, huge panic attack and now flashbacks that seem constant

I really don't want to do this anymore, I am sick of fighting it. It's too hard. All I want to do is go to sleep and never wake up.
I am on medication but recently I just feel like I am going backwards

I also take quetiapine which is supposed to help with the lack of sleep, but doesn't really help much.
I used to have a cpn through the perinatal team but when I was discharged from them I was left under the care of the gp. Now I am lucky to just get an appointment

I definitely need more help but the gp doesn't see that.

I will definitely look into it. Otherwise I'm just going to be left like this for evermore (slight exaggeration)