About my son

[insanityscatching]

Posted the other day about my son who had spoken about committing suicide. I managed to persuade him to go to the GP and although he didn't speak about how ill he feels she did prescribe anti depressants.
I have phoned the GP myself to alert her to ds not saying how bad he feels and am going tomorrow to talk to her myself as I'm really worried for him.
I know that as he is an adult she won't talk to me but I need to tell her what I know but want to ask for thoughts on what I know or suspect at least.
Ds has, I think, been living a fantasy life for the last three months (possibly more). He "goes to work" but there is no salary and yet he has come up with a whole host of scenarios that would be and have been entirely believable had he been being paid. This is a "new" job that he had a successful interview for three months ago I have no idea why he left his last job as it was supposedly for this better one that I don't think exists.
I read his phone (I know I shouldn't have but I was desperate) he's written about his demons and his voices although I have no idea what his demons are as he doesn't drink or smoke or do drugs.
He disappears for hours on end doesn't answer the phone and I don't know where he goes, he came back in the early hours of this morning with no explanation. Sometimes he texts to say he's ten minutes away but then turns off his phone and doesn't come back for hours again oblivious to the worry he's caused.
There are other little things like he stares into space for hours, is very distracted and just absent I suppose.
Any thoughts or advice please?

Didn't want to leave unanswered. Sorry I have no real advice to give, apart from to say it must be terrifying for you. I'm not sure the GP leaving ot at just anti-depressants seems reasonable based on your post and when you brief them tomorrow there may be more action.

I hope someone comes along soon with real advice for you.

x

You might have seen the GP now but I think it would be best if you and your son go together as he probably didn't tell her what was happening. I think it sounds like your son needs to be referred to the Community Mental Health Team for an assessment or possibly seen by a psychiatrist for assessment and diagnosis. His behaviour certainly seems bizarre and I assume out of character, or have there been other things that have worried you in the past. How old is he by the way - and assume he is living at home.

When he disappears is he with mates or on his own or maybe you don't know. How can you be sure he isn't drinking or taking drugs - so many young people do these days. The "demons" maybe unpleasant voices he is hearing in his head, and these can be very distressing.
Really hope your son can get the help he needs. The thing is even though he is an adult, with MH issues the family are very important as they will notice if someone's mental health is deteriorating and can alert the GP or CMHT.

I'm as near certain as I could possibly be tbh. He's 27 and still at home, he's not long broken up with his girlfriend who I now suspect had discovered his fantasy life and was going to tell me. He's never smoked or taken drugs and very rarely drinks and even then two or three is the norm for him. He certainly hasn't come home under the influence of anything in the last four months anyway and around Christmas was the last time he had a drink. I always say he has appeared middle aged since he was about fourteen he has never really bothered with getting drunk, clubbing etc.
It is so out of character, I can't quite grasp what's happening and it has taken me until now to scratch the surface because I have no doubt there is more that I have missed in the last three months. It's as though I don't know him anymore because he's always been so steady, easy going, relaxed and cheerful previously.
When he disappears he's on his own, walking for miles I think or at least that's what he must be doing in the dead of night around here. We are both going to the GP tomorrow although he's disappeared again today and might do again tomorrow.

I hope your son turns up to get to the GP but it's possible that he will duck out as it's not easy for a young person to see a GP about MH issues. Not sure if you have told him you've looked at his phone but what you discovered is worrying and something the GP needs to know. Could this be related to the break up of his relationship by any chance?

Hope you get some help from the GP - it's so hard when our kids are adults isn't it as we can't make things better like we could when they were little.

His fantasy life started before he and his girlfriend broke up. I think his girlfriend knew about his fictional job and was putting pressure on him to come clean and he ended it rather than face up to what was happening.
I've spoken to him tonight to ask what happened to his previous job and he says he just decided to leave and walked out with no thoughts or plans for what came next. The fantasy job gave him a routine,time alone and no one asked questions until he ran out of money. It seems quite surreal, he has no idea why or what made him do this and of course he's in no state to make any progress in sorting this out. He has said he'll go to the GP "after work" tomorrow