Has anyone 'got over' Social Phobia?

[BabyDubsEverywhere]

Mines getting worse, much worse. My quality of life is so low now that I can't see the point in it carrying on.

I have Bipolar, but the social anxiety is worse for me right now.

It started 7 and a half years ago, when our first dc was born. We have four now, I have never been able to take them out anywhere without my DH. I manage the school run once or twice a week, but I am so stressed before and after that its all I can think about on the days I do it.

I go to Uni, but I don't talk to a sole, bar a couple of good friends I already have there. I wont go off for a wander or anything, I go to lectures and straight back to a room we use for working and do as much as possible by email. I cant remember the last time I went into a shop, even with my DH, they are too bright and I feel like I look like a shoplifter or something. I certainly wouldn't go with the DC with us, and they are always with us.
In the last 12 months I think I have been out 3 times with my dh on 'girls nights'. They are a small group of good friends and relatives, but even just these three times have felt too much, so anxious and sick, before and after.

I have been trying to work out what it is that I am so anxious about, I think its embarrassment, fear of feeling embarrassment rather, but I don't know what to do with that now I have worked it out. I am getting worse, its not just out of the house now, its now inside too. Having people come to my house is making me feel ill.

The same small group of friends used to come to my house on my day off Uni, (knowing that I couldn't go out anywhere or to theirs) but even that has been too much since Xmas and I have cancelled for one reason or another. If they do come I feel totally crippled with anxiety before they arrive, and spend the next few days analysing it all. I don't do this on purpose, I try to keep my mind busy with other things, but it wont stop, I cant concentrate on anything else, just this constant cycling analysing of how/why/when I am being a twat and feeling more and more mortified by my self.

I'm seeing my psych team on Friday, but I just wanted to hear from really people... Has anyone actually come out of the other side, or will I be this way forever now?

(sorry this is so long )

sorry about the typos

I can't do spontaneous very easily but I can do planned things or places I've been before now with less anxiety. My counsellor taught me about habituation. The longer you can manage to stay somewhere the more comfortable and less anxious you'll get. That's helped.

I was like you last summer and didn't even want to do the school run or go out to work and it was a huge case of forcing myself to and feeling really anxious and uncomfortable.
I hope you can get some advice off your team about ways to help with this.

Hey,

I still have a way to go, but I have got so much better with this. Like you I totally fear embarrassment.

I was advised to do all the things I'm afraid of, and say yes to the things I'd normally turn down. It was really scary at first but got easier...

I did.
Had lots of counselling, took the meds, took up yoga, no alcohol, removed a lot of the stressors from my life, basically did whatever it took to get better.
I've been great for years now. Don't even need the anti-d's anymore.
I used to have constant panic attacks that included projectile vomit (niiice) and utter meltdown. I will always be an introvert but I'm totally fine with that. I can cope well around others (no one would have a clue if they met me) and I work intensively with the public every day.
I was very ill for approx 9 years. Life is so much better now.
It can be done, but it takes ages. Marathon, not a sprint

Oh yes, exercise helps :)

I run like Phoebe in that Friends episode..

I did too. Medication (might be tricky for you if you have bipolar) helped, but the main thing was CBT. It's a lot of work, but it really does the trick. Exercise is also important for mental health.

My life is so much better now. It's not perfect, but no longer an agony of social anxiety.

At the moment I feel like just because X situation was okay last time, it doesn't mean that it will be the next time. Its almost like I am tempting fate to do things rather than getting used to them. I know its totally illogical, I just cant seem to stop the thought process... I don't actually know how to stop it, and it interrupts all other thought. I manage to look okay normal when I am with people, so the ones I do share this information with don't really get how bad I am, its before and after it hits me. I am sick so often my teeth are crumbling from the acid.

I have no life at all, obviously it also effects my DC and my DH which makes me feel so guilty.

Thank you for your replies, its good to hear from real people. I don't even know what the team will say, they are so focused on the Bipolar that they don't seem to pay much attention to the anxiety. Its just as crippling though!!

I would love to exercise, I desperately need to. But I couldn't go anywhere to do it, and I am so embarrassed by my own body (even with clothes on) that I try not to move around more than necessary to prevent being seen... even at home, even just in front of the toddler and baby... [fuck me I am totally nuts!]

Yes, I could never switch my brain off, found it impossible to relax and could never get to sleep, even with tranqs, was hell.
My top tip is to get a couple of really good audio books, a candle, switch off the lights and settle in. Knocks me out in half an hour these days. Luckily my audible thingy can be set to switch off after a preset time. It's like magic