I am really struggling

[tumbleweed72]

and I'm not sure who I am anymore...I am going through a counselling group course for childhood sexual abuse , I am half way through and it is really helping in so many ways, I can identify many things that I do and am trying hard to change how I think about life in general etc

I am just finding myself in complete turmoil inside, I feel lost and zoned out from everyone, has anyone else gone through this sort of thing, think I just need to no there's some sort of light at the end, my partners being brilliant but I don't want to bring him down so I do try and keep as positive as I can . At the moment I just don't feel like being very socialable .

I'm sorry to hear about what you've been through and the way you feel now. Have you been to your gp or are you taking any medication?

I might be wrong so feel free to tell me to bugger off, but perhaps look up PTSD or dissociative disorder. It might explain the feeling of being cut off from other people. I can dissociate myself from things/people because that's what I did to help me cope with being sexually abused. I'm sorry you went through what you went through

Have you ever looked at Tiny Buddha? Google it, lots of comforting things are said there

BisleyBoy thank you , yes I saw gp few months back and she recommended a counsellor for me to see but it was so expensive so I found this course instead, and no not taking any medication...

I just looked up dissociate disorder so so true! I do it so much at the moment and not sure if its my way of healing or not, I can get to work and still see people I know and go places I know but new people and places are worrying me a little while I'm having this counselling.

Thank you so much for replying

From what I understand it's your minds way of protecting yourself. It's kind of like a coping mechanism, but of course it's outlasted it's use now that the danger has gone.
It may be that the course is bringing up lots of repressed memories and emotions which is leading to the feelings you have now.

You are doing challenging, harrowing work. It would be strange if it wasn't affecting you somehow. It's not going to be like this forever, it's just how it feels right now.

Im glad it's helping. I think the most important thing right now is to be kind to yourself.