Copied from another thred:
Is there anyone else out there who still doens't feel that they have bonded wih their child? I've read thread after thread like this and the general answer seems to be - gie it time once they are a bit older it will happen. How old is a bit older? DS is now 18 months and if I was 100% honest I don't love him. I'd feel sad if he was hurt - the same way I do when i watch a sad film or see a bird thats been run over. But people keep saying things like, you must miss him (I don't) but its worth it when they give you a smile etc (it isn't) Oh you're just tired (well yes I am but it doesn't matter how much sleep/rest/me time I get I don't love him or feel any sort of bond)
Been to my GP and they told me I was depressed, of course i'm bloody depressed. Think about all the tiring/boring things that having a toddler entials, now imagine you honestly don't feel any warmth or joy in any of it.
So I am getting up any time from 3am onwards (always up by 6am) constantly washing up/tidying, constantly worried and anxiuos about whether I'm doing the right thing for DS, my relationship with DH is on the rocks cos we're both so tired and angry, clothes and possessoins are continually getting wrecked, the house is a tip, I failed this year of my degree - all because I now have responsibility for a baby/toddler.
Wouldn't you be depressed if your life was like that?
I read THUD (terry pratchet) last night and cried, he writes about how the central character (Sam Vimes) feels about his little boy - I don;t feel any of that, I don't have the impulse to watch him sleep or any of those misty eyed moments.
Oh and before any asks he is a curious, happy, active, charming, engaging, independant little boy. Despite the early mornigns he does sleep 7am - 5/6am most days and 2 hrs at lunchtime. He has no disabilities, frankly most of my friends adore him, its just me and Dh who don't.
Should I go and talk to my HV or my GP? what have people found the most helpful, what AD's have been useful and what about side effects?
Has anyone just found that getting the hell away from the baby/kid/house helped?
I just took the edinburgh test and scored 20.