What do you do when you're a SAHM & you feel like you need to be signed off?

[MyGastIsTinselled]

I feel so rotten, both mentally & physically. If I was still at work I'd be asking to be signed off but I don't. How do I get DH to understand that I need more help?

You have posted this in mh so i assume this is more than just being knackered and pissed off.

Have you told him you need help and why?

what is it particular you are struggling with?

Working or SAH you just have to battle through. You need to talk to your DH and try to explain what you need from him.

Well no, you don't have to battle through without help, especially if you are struggling with your MH. There is help available in terms of couneslling and medication. It is really hard for partners and despite TRYING to be supportive of my anxiety, my DP struggles and can get pretty frustrated at times. No one really understands mental illness unless they have been there themselves.

You don't need to struggle through.
If your finding it hard to talk to DH, would writing down what you struggle with help (you, if not him)?

Is there any money in the budget for a small amount of child care to give you a couple of hours breathing space? Or can you get away at the weekend?

Different, as I'm working, but I've shifted my hours to work 4.5 days (4 longer days to get a friday afternoon off), and the sheer relief of having those 2.5 hrs to myself are amazing.

Have you been to the GP to see if counselling or AD's might help?

and

I've battled depression for years & am on ADs but recently my exhaustion has gone to a whole new level-sometimes I have to crawl up the stairs as I barely have the energy to move. I know what lethargy in depression is like & this is something else.

If I'd broken my arm or something DH would be bending over backwards to help me, but because 'it's all in my head' he just gives me one lie in & expects everything to be back to normal.

Is it definitely all depression related? Have you had iron, thyroid and vitamin D levels checked?

Do you think it could be compounded by low iron or vit D?
Is it worth thinking about a vit and mineral supplement for a few weeks?
Sounds like you really need to talk to DH, however unreceptive he is initially. Has he seen how exhausted you are?

Had my thyroid checked fairly recently (within last few months) & it's at the low end of normal. I have blood last week so am not anaemic. I'm only 40, eat a healthy, balanced diet & take a multivitamin every day so really shouldn't be this exhausted, despite having 2 young children.

But have you explicitly been to your GP and told him/her about the lethargy? There are many physical things that can cause such tiredness. You say that this is dif to depressed-lethargy, which only supports the view that you go to your GP.

I've got an appointment tomorrow morning.

Pre-school funding - 15 hours free term after 3 is a godsend. Fr lower income earners it is after 2yrs.
Can you contact your HV and ask from referral to home start? A volunteer can come for 2hours a week which may help.

So I went to the Dr today & she's referring me to the ME service, plus recommended going gluten free as my last blood test was equivocal for coeliac disease. Plus she's going to speak to my HV to see if more help there can be accessed. So feeling a bit more positive today.