Aw no - I don't want to go down that road again :-(

[Spookler1]

Have suffered with depression since diagnosed with PND with dd2 who is nearly 5. Never admitted to being down until she was about 13 months old. Everyone kept asking me what was wrong and I would answer "I'm fine, why?, stop asking me". I eventually admitted to not feeling mysel and GP put me onto ADs and referred me for counselling. This all worked brilliantly - although naturally, still had my up and down days. About a year ago I came off the ADs and I have been brilliant since.
For the past few days I have been feeling really tired and feeling that something "isn't right". DH has been questioning me and again I have been answering with the I'm fine. Inside I know something isn't right but, for some reason, I can't bring myself to admit that maybe I don't feel right after all. Guess I'm trying to tell myself that I'm not going to go down that road again.
I need to pick myself up somehow and don't know how to do it. Before I get as down as I was before.
All the familiar things are going round in my head. Things like, I don't know why I should be unhappy as I'm am very, very lucky with everything I have in my life.
Sorry, I'm babbling a bit aren't I? Just wanted to get it off my chest a bit and no better place than MN.

There are the obvious delays:

Eat well
Sleep lots
Exercise a lot
Get lots of light (I have a SAD light, and it does seem to help when I use it)
Do things you enjoy

Etc. etc. These work to a degree and can deal well with mild depression. Remember not to beat yourself up over being lucky with your life. Depression is an illness as valid as all others. You don't have to feel guilty for not enjoying life.

Spookler, you are not necessarily going to end up 'going down that road again'. You have recognised the signs and that is a major step. Sometimes it seems like a bout of depression is looming, but it may not actually materialise. And yes, you may have no apparent reason to feel down, but as you surely know, depression doesn't work like that. All the practical things suggested by the last poster are great - do them! And if all still doesn't feel well, talk to your dp, talk to family, go back to your gp and talk talk talk!!

Oh Spookler . I always find that being tired really affects my mood and I panic that I'm getting ill again, then pick up.

You don't have to have a reason for your mood being low, you know, it can just happen. But you have had a bit on your plate lately with starting work again, so it might just be a little wobble.

Thanks guys.

Still feeling low today - really tired. Didn't sleep very well last night, more than likely due to the fact that I demolished three quarters of a bottle of white wine last night.
Shall try and get an earlier night tonight and see if that helps.

How are you today?

Hi Dior - thanks for asking. Things seem better today after a better nights sleep. I feel a bit up and down. Poor DH is getting the brunt of it all though - I have been quite snappy with him. .
Gonna get some tea down me in a bit and have an earlier night - I think sleep is very much on my agenda this week. I think it will help.

Definitely. Here's to a good night's sleep for you. x