Going through a difficult time. Support please!

[Arcadia]

I have had some great support on here in the past.
I don't know where to start.
I went into work on Monday and was handed a letter by my boss inviting me to a formal disciplinary meeting regarding errors made in my work. I have been having a bad feeling at work lately, thinking I may be out of favour, having been 'golden girl' until a few months ago (I don't know what changed).
I kept it together (i.e. Didn't cry) but left immediately, went to a friends house, made doctors appointment and solicitors appointment etc. saw a lovely (new) GP on Tuesday who signed me off for two weeks. Work then 'leaked' the contents of my sick note that I had scanned and emailed to them, as I got a text from a friend at work quoting it, so I complained and they have apologised.
Have seen a solicitor who says constructive dismissal cases are difficult.

Have argued with DP who feels I am being overly dramatic when I say I don't want to go back and is worried we will lose our house etc. he doesn't really get it. It is such a stressful environment even without this.

Can't really give too many more details about work situation but I am reasonably paid, part time and have worked very hard to get where I am over the last nine years. Would be bad to get back in if I drop out and would earn half the amount in another job.

I am so anxious and feel like things are falling apart. I had been struggling anyway with dashing around and doing networking events etc. and staying late at work to get things done and juggling at with getting DD (4) settled into primary school this past month which has upset me more than I expected.

I feel a mess. I am on 10mg citalopram which I managed to get down from 20mg and will see GP again next week and decide whether to go back up.

I am seeing friends and time has gone weird - some hours rush past and other times it crawls,

I have tried writing a letter to work but I just ended up agreeing with them that I am sh**.

I am not even a good mother I feel so rubbish,

How shall I get through these days/weeks? I already miss the mental stimulation of work.

Sorry so long.

Have you got a union, perhaps they can go into the meeting with you.

Have you got a union, perhaps they can go into the meeting with you.

Thanks piper no we don't. The letter says I can take a colleague or union rep but seems meaningless as we don't have a union and I don't feel I can ask any of my colleagues as management are notoriously ruthless and I don't want any of my colleagues to feel that they have to get involved.

I am playing for time really by going off sick and is increasing my anxiety, but I am terrified of a meeting. As I say, the management are completely ruthless and really do not care.