Anxiety worried about going back to work

[RooCluckers]

Hi,
I'd really appreciate any thoughts/advice. I have two children and went back to work after adoption leave a year ago. I went back part time and used the funding for the second half of my post to hire a junior colleague who does the easier bits of my job and I do the harder bits. I have struggled since I have been back to work out what I can take on as a part timer and I don't feel the work I do is particularly helpful/useful to my team any more.

I have always struggled with anxiety and depression but this has got work since I had my children. My oldest has some difficulties which is hard to cope with all day everyday. I feel quite panicky a lot, I have ibs, I worry about everything, I am so tired, I don't sleep that well. I feel tearful and struggle to get motivated to do anything.

A couple of weeks ago things came to ahead when I just sat at my computer and couldn't write anything. So I went off sick, went to see GP who gave me sertraline and signed me off for two weeks.

I have been of just over 3 weeks and am due to go back tomorrow. I am starting to feel really panicky and don't know what to do. Part of me thinks I should just go back to work as I am worried the longer i leave going back the harder it will be. And I am bound to be anxious about going back. Another part of me just wants to stay at home and cry!

I would suggest getting more help and support before going bAck to work. Are you having counselling?

3 weeks off isn't actually all that long as these things go. If you have a fit note then ideally your GP would have advised you to come back to them before it expires to see how you are and to see if the note needs extending or you perhaps need a phased return to work.

I was initially signed off for 3 weeks and knew I wasn't ready to return after that period. I spoke with my GP and was given another 4 weeks. I was very worried that I would never want to go back and my GP said this was a common concern and I suppose when you are feeling depressed or anxious it's not surprising you might feel like that. I took the 4 weeks and I am glad I did, it helped me get established on the meds, I took some CBT counselling in that time which was enormously helpful and by the end of the 4 weeks I felt robust enough to go back to work with a phased return to help ease me in.

Go back to your GP and talk about how you are feeling, tell them you are not ready for work. Be honest about how you are feeling, if you go back before you are ready you will probably only end up going back off again.

Take care xx

Thanks for replying. After a sleepless night I came to the same conclusion!! I am awaiting a call from GP to ask for extended leave. I think I just didn't want to be off, I love my job normally and it means a lot to me. I also didn't want to admit to my family and colleagues that I was struggling. I feel really pathetic and just want to feel back to my normal self again! Thanks again