Should I take medication?

[FoolOfATook]

I saw the doctor today and she asked if I think I wanted to take medication.

Basic backstory is I'm down, very down a lot of the time.

Last year I moved house to live with my boyfriend as I was pregnant. (300 miles away from former home)

They day I left my dad was hospitalised with a chest infection.

My ds was born a week after I moved. This was 2 months early. I had him at home, on my own on the bed after a very quick 30 minute labour.

Ds was in hospital for 4 weeks. He's now a happy healthy 18 month old

My dad passed away 2 days before my ds's due date. 2 months after he was originally hospitalised.

I'm always feeling low. Nothing seems to give me pleasure anymore and I can't seen to get excited about anything.

Things that make me unhappy are being away from all friends and family. I have no one here apart from do and ds.

Money, I'm not working do we live on dos wage. We are coping well but I miss being able to have a wander round the shops. I gave up a well paid job.

I miss my job, the people and having something to do. I know when I look back at this time I'm going to be glad I've spent the time with ds but it brings me down at the minute.

Ds is at the age now that he wants to do things but I'm too shy to take him to parent and toddlers. There don't seem to be any structured groups around here. Just drop in sessions that scary the daylights out of me.

Myself and dp don't seem to be getting on. He tries his best but I don't feel the same feeling for him that I used to.

The house we are in needs a fair bit of work. We are doing it slowly but it gets to me.

I saw the doctor a couple of weeks ago and again today. She suggested medication. Firstly she told me to try parent and toddler groups and exercise. I'm going back in a month to discuss things further.

I know there's no easy fix but I just want to feel normal again. I want to look forward to things like Christmas and birthdays rather than dread them.

Sorry you are feeling so low Took (not going to call you Fool!) Did you have a good relationship with your dad - if so the loss of him is probably contributing very much to the way you are feeling just now. Also the move - that's another loss - your job - another loss - your friends and family - another loss. You're a new(ish) mum with no support. It's small wonder you are feeling so low. Loss (of any kind, not necessarily a death) is almost always the root cause of depression.

You don't say why you moved so far away - DP's hometown/job maybe? Had you been together very long before you got pregnant.

You sound absolutely "adrift" and are suffering from the loss that all is familiar to you. I am usually pro meds but I can't help thinking that in your case the problem is your circumstances and maybe that's what needs to change to regain your mental health. Is it possible to go back to live near family and friends again, and maybe get a job (even in part time) - though assume that would create difficulties for you and DP. I think your "cooling off" with DP is a result of your present circumstances and is inevitable. Has he lost anything? Does he understand how all these losses are affecting you?

I get the feeling you have moved from urban to rural but I might be wrong.

Meds might lift you a little I'm not sure - the research seems to indicate that they don't really work well at all for mild depression but there wouldn't be any harm in trying them I suppose. The real way back though is to end this isolation and think about returning to your own part of the country. Sorry if this isn't possible.

Thank you for the reply.

We are living where we are due to dp job. We are living in a nice quiet area, house surrounded by farmland which is lovely for ds and the cat!

We chose to live here rather than the area I am from because dp has a good job here, the rent on our house is considerably cheaper than anything we could get down south so I can say at hone with ds and not have to work just to make ends meet.

I do think you are right though. I went home for the weekend with ds to visit my mum and I realised just how homesick I am. I miss my mums house, spending time with my family. The village I grew up in and the area I knew.

I just got home to my house and cried. I'm sure I will be ok in the morning but right now I hate it.

So sorry to hear how you feel. Obviously everyone is different but I recently started taking citalopram after dithering about drugs for ages and I feel so much better. Still myself but calmer and more peaceful, generally more able to deal with life. I regarded myself as anxious and generally down and it has helped so please consider taking something if your GP advises it. It sounds like you have had a lot of change recently, I hope you feel better soon