I just noticed there was a mental health section after posting in relationships. Perhaps Mental Health might be a better area for my question.
I was very happily married to my wife of 6 years, but she had a breakdown and changed very quickly. After the severe anxious / agitated breakdown phase she moved into a very severe depression where I discovered she was even considering suicide.
She was slow to agree to treatment, but eventually after about 3 months started SSRIs and while they worked wonders to get her up and back to a normal life they also seemed to suck the essence of her away completely.
It's hard to describe but it was like being with a corpse. The depressed version of her was very sad and low but still "her". With the medication I feel like she is a complete stranger. All affection went out the window and she recoiled from me in bed for the first time since we met. Even cuddles.
Shortly after starting the SSRIs she agreed to go to counselling and after the first session she came home and announced that she had discussed it with her counsellor and she didn't love me anymore and was leaving. She would not explain beyond that, she just said she was sorry.
She moved back in with her parents 20 miles away and took her two daughters from a previous marriage (who I had raised) with her. I also had kids from a previous marriage who considered her to be "Mum" but she just upped and abandoned us all.
After that she rarely wanted contact but when I did get it, it was very cold and detached. She says contact with me makes it harder for her and she has to get better. She only says she doesn't love me anymore and it's best for me to find someone who loves me the way she used to before she was ill.
It's been more than a year now since this began and it's been 6 months since she left. I love my wife deeply and can't imagine life without her but I can't reach her.