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Is this honestly normal?

6 replies

daisysmummy13 · 06/08/2014 00:43

My daughter is 6 week old and since she had been born I have been really low.
When we bought her home from hospital after a complicated delivery and long stay, I was constantly nervous about having her in the house, even to the point that if resented family members for beings rounder as I got nervous but not sure what about. Since then, I have constant self-conflict about whether I am happy about having my baby, part of me loves her to bits but then another part of me feels I can't cope and longs for my old life and the life I could have had before her, thoughts that again make me feel like a terrible mother.
My partner doesn't really help much, he claims he can't do night feeds etc because of work but then doesn't do much else either, just gets the cuddly times. I know this could be baby blues which isn't helped by the fact I am a teenage mum but I feel like I am in a pit and not sure how to get out, is this normal and will it soon subside?

OP posts:
Choochootrain1 · 06/08/2014 00:48

It sounds a bit more than the normal blues, everyone can get overwhelmed though.

I recommend contacting PANDAS x

andsmile · 06/08/2014 00:59

Yes those feelings are normal for all new mums to a greater or lesser degree, reguardless of age.

If you have had a complicated delivery this means you have even more healing to do both physical and emotionally.

A lot of new mums feel very protective about their newborn being around others which yes can make you feel edgy. But then you'd be gutted if no one was interested - well I sed to think this Smile

Conflict - yep this is a period of change as you get to your your baby and a new way of living. Its normal to miss stuff you could do before. Keep you baby close, cuddle lots to help with bonding which can take time. Its different for everyone.

Tell your partner you need their help. It maybe they feel out of their depth and havnt a clue, show them how to bath, feed and wind (if bottle fed).

Yes it absolutley baby blues - keep an eye on how you feel but please give yourself time to recover from the birth - not everyone is up and about and 'popping back into shape' (rare if you ask me!)

Tell you HV how you feel if you dont fee like you levelling out. It can be hard to sort out how you feel when tired too, even after recovery from the birth.

When you feel up to it (and only then) try to go out short distances. Gradually build up. Plenty time for baby groups later which help a lot to see others and get into a new routine.

I hope this helps. Keep reading on here, there are lots of threads about birth, recovery, early baby days in other sections. When you are up late stuck with baby and tired try to read these - I always felt less alone then

Take care x

andsmile · 06/08/2014 01:00

and keep posting here too its a very supportive board

andsmile · 07/08/2014 10:43

daisey how are you?

daisysmummy13 · 07/08/2014 23:00

Thanks for your help, it's swings and roundabouts for me, one minute I feel great and the next I feel out of my depth but I guess that's what becoming a mum is about! I just keep thinking to myself it will get better and everything will work as it should so fingers crossed!

OP posts:
adviceforme · 08/08/2014 08:30

Just be mindful of your mood swings it could be tiredness it could be a but more than baby blues.

Keep posting, read other threads and if it doesn't level out see you GP

x

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