Oh help. I think I'm coming unravelled.

[Unravelry]

I thought I was all completely fine until very recently.

Then I started having problems with panic and anxiety. Then I started sleeping a lot in the daytime. And now I've been googling a couple of things and I find that my long term inability to have sex is down to vaginismus which is linked to anxiety, and the daily picking of my face which means I have to cover up all the scars with concealer is some sort of OCD.

Oh FFS. I feel most peculiar. How odd is all of this? I thought I was normal? But now there seem to be names for things which come under the headings of Disorders and I feel a bit disembodied.

The thing to remember is that panic, anxiety, picking at your skin are all things within the range of 'normal' non-disordered behaviour that nearly everyone has. What makes them become a 'disorder' is the extent of them - that is how much they are distressing you, and how much impairment they cause in your daily life and functioning. So it is best not to focus too much on 'am I normal/am I odd', but just on getting help when you need it.

Skin picking is associated with OCD, in that many people with OCD (I saw one estimate of 25%, another of two thirds) also have hair pulling or skin picking problems. But I don't think skin picking is in and of itself necessarily OCD. I would not diagnose anything definite, including the sexual problems, through Google.

Go to your GP and tell them honestly what has been happening and that you are confused. I think the signs you have are at a point where you should get help as it is troubling you, and it could (not definitely but could) get worse untreated. Step in now and request some mental health assessment (could lead to counselling or some type of talking/behavioural therapy) and see if they would advise trying some anti-depressants. Hope you feel better soon. Please don't hesitate to go to GP as soon as you possibly can, they have a huge proportion of appointments that are mental health related so mental health issues are not abnormal. They are part of being human for many of us. Good luck.

WOW that is a terrific post temporaryusername - I found you first para really interesting and could be applied to many issues other than the ones raised by the OP.

Thank you temporaryusername. That is very reassuring. I shall stop googling and focus on coping.

Thanks NanaNina - I'm trying to go on what I'm learning as I try to deal with my own 'issues'

Hi OP - Hopefully it is a bit reassuring in one sense, but I definitely don't think you should just focus on 'coping' in the sense of ploughing on trying to function as best you can, despite the warning signs you've had that you're finding it increasingly hard. While worrying and other things are normal, if they get out of control they can make life extremely difficult. They might not get worse, but they might, and it is important to try and stop that now. I also don't know the full extent of what could be going on with you which is best assessed by someone in real life. I think you should go to your GP, really, and get any help you need now. Unfortunately it isn't always easy to get the help instantly, but make sure you don't let your problems be dismissed. Let us know how you get on.

Thank you. I don't know why I didn't mention it, but I am a few sessions into short term therapy anyway because I didn't feel I was coping with stress. But I hadn't told her the things I've just said.

So I did tell her a bit yesterday. And it was very very strange and I nearly fainted and couldn't speak or open my eyes for a bit. I'm scared. Do people do that in therapy sessions?

I don't know to be honest. I am sure people get very upset and sometimes get physical symptoms of stress, but whenever there are physical symptoms like you describe I would get them checked out by your GP in case something different is going on. You could also chat with your GP about medications if you haven't already.

How did you feel during that strange period? Would it have been difficult/stressful to speak or open your eyes, or impossible? What did the therapist think?

It is really good you're seeing her and it was so brave of you to share some things with her. I think that is important. But also important to make sure you have been assessed and are seeing the right kind of therapist. Did you contact this therapist directly or were you referred to her?

I contacted her directly. I hope I haven't done the wrong thing. She is apparently v experienced etc.

She said it was panic and it was my mind trying to protect itself.

I went to the GP too but I didn't say much, I just talked about how tired I am. She says I am depressed and exercise will help.

I don't think you've done the wrong thing at all, if you get on with her that is good. I just wondered if she is a psychologist/psychotherapist/ or counsellor or whatever. Sometimes they are trained in different kinds of therapies. It might very well have been panic. It isn't easy sharing things you don't normally talk about and maybe even try not to think about.

If it was me though I would definitely tell my GP about the physical symptoms I had at that moment, but that may just be my anxiety issues coming into it, I'd want to rule out any other cause! You could tell her you were in a session and are prepared to put it down to panic but would like her to check you out just to be sure there's no underlying physical cause.

Exercise probably would help, but it seems a bit unhelpful if that is all she gave you. Sometimes with these doctors you really have to spell out how are feeling and how it impacts you to get the help you need, I know it is hard but once you've got through to them it can be worth it. She might feel, I don't know, that taking an anti-depressant could help you to tackle therapy.

Look after yourself

Thank you.