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Moving house...and i am desperately scared

6 replies

sharron6970 · 08/06/2014 10:23

Hi, I am moving house at the end of the month, and feeling very vulnerable and scared. For the last 8 years in my current property, all I have had is neighbours who inflict domestic violence on their partners. The most recent events happened at the end of dec last year when I got a new neighbour. My the first week of jan her ex turned up and almost immediately the verbal abuse started then the violence..i have been kept awake most nights from 10pm-6am listening to this. On many occasions the police were called, when all comes to all, she has been given her notice to quit.

I agreed to take the new house as I wanted away from this, and I am turmoil now and starting to judge myself if I am doing the right thing. The last time I moved my children's dad was with me, and that was over 10 years ago..i am having to do everything on my own, sorted the redirection and removal of everything. I am finding it impossible, upsetting and very tiring both emotionally/physically....and not to mention the financial side!! I have only very recently got a boyfriend who knows how I feel, and I have support in some ways, but constantly waking up with butterflies and feeling sick about it all...is it normal to feel like this? And to make matters worse, I bumped into the street's busybody, who slagged everyone off who lived there, and said it was a horrible street with horrible ppl and that she was taking ppl to court including our housing association because of the ppl they have put in! Oh, and she is taking the police to court as well as she feels they aren't doing enough!! That really didn't help the way I was feeling..:( x

OP posts:
Jenda · 08/06/2014 14:10

Firstly, ignore the busy body! You sound like you are doing the right thing. I am moving at the end of the month too, not the same situation but I feel quite overwhelemed about it too. Im finding it helpful to make lists. This is what ive done so far
Gone through my finances and made a very strict budget to allow for any unexpected costs.

Made a list of everything I need to clean.
Made a rota of which days I will do which rooms on.
Collected cardboard boxes from supermarkets and bought black plastic sacks.
Made a promise to myself to be RUTHLESS. If I don't use it/ look at it/ need it, its going!
Made friends aware of my moving date so they can help me.

im still making lists but im tackling the garden today, its rented so has to be up to a standard and ive not touched it for a year Blush

Good luck, hopefully someone with better advice will be along soon Grin

Jenda · 08/06/2014 14:11

By the way, I said the lists because when I am feeling anxious amd panicky it helps me to get a bit of perspective Smile

LastingLight · 08/06/2014 15:27

It sounds as if you live in a horrible place and moving is the only logical thing to do. Do you have a friend / colleague / family member who has recently moved and can give you some tips? I agree with Jenda, make a detailed list of everything that needs to be done, that will at least remove the anxiety that you might forget about something. Then work from your list. You've got 3 weeks, prioritise so that you know what you need to do first. How old are your dc, can they help at all?

LastingLight · 08/06/2014 15:47

My biggest problem the last time I moved was to actually get started. A good friend gave me a kick up the bum and helped me pack, this made a huge difference. Will your boyfriend or someone else be willing to help? I got completely bogged down in trying to decide if I would keep things or donate/throw away. Since you don't have a lot of time I suggest you make quick decisions about stuff you definitely don't want to keep and just pack the rest, you can always sort out again while unpacking.

sharron6970 · 10/06/2014 19:17

Hi, thanks ppl! Yeh, I made a list ages ago for if/when a house became available and been working off that. Paid for my removals today, and tom will get my post redirected. A friend of mine has helped me take stuff over to the new house, and is selling stuff I don't need! Starting to feel a bit better about it, but the neighbour issue is still one that is very present, and still getting butterflies about! The kids rooms are last as there is very little in them, as threw out loads of there stuff 3 months ago lol! x

OP posts:
Jenda · 10/06/2014 21:42

Brilliant, you're doing much better than me Grin

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