I will have to come back to this in the morning because I need to go to bed, but I could really do with some help.
I think dh has rapid cycling bipolar disorder. He goes from seriously depressed, can't do anything, very low mood, tearful, anxious, doesn't want to go anywhere, sleeps all the time, angry at himself, hopeless... To manic, going out all the time, racing thoughts, impulsive, irritable, not sleeping or eating, big plans which he never sees through.. etc etc.
A couple of nights ago he went out and threw eggs in two blokes faces then came back and laughed his head off. He kept acting out what he had done and got more and more hyped up. He was stalking around the park looking for them, his reasoning being that they were being noisy and I was worried they would wake dd.
He has decided to buy a car that we can't afford.
He goes out nearly every night because he can't stop and relax.
Tonight he had a panic attack because his thoughts were racing so much. He thought he was having a heart attack because his chest hurt so much.
He chased a man with a baseball bat a few nights ago because he was tresspassing at the fishing lake where dh is a bailiff. He didn't care what would happen if he hurt him.
He talks so fast at the minute and jumps from thought to thought, I can't keep up.
Over the years he has gone from one extreme to the other, rarely 'normal'. When manic he has the biggest ideas, he is going to be a champion bodybuilder, a famous inline skater, a dj, artist, tattooist... The list goes on. They all start off as an obsession, then fizzle to nothing when he comes back down to earth.
The problem is, he has no insight whatsoever. He refuses to accept he has a mental health problem. When I point out what has happened lately, he laughs or changes the subject. If the conversation gets to a point where he is realising that I am not joking and there is a problem he gets defensive and stops talking. He is so far in denial it is unreal even though he can't deny what I am saying.
What the hell do I do? I am banging my head against a brick wall. He is getting worse and worse and I don't know what is going to happen. He will admit that he isn't very stable, but his only solution is to try harder to be stable. I don't think that is going to work.
Any advice is hugely appreciated. Sorry if my post isn't very clear.