I just can't keep doing this

[tree1000]

I just want to have down what I am thinking, I am expecting no response.

I am trying, I am wishing these bloody pills will work. I just can't doing this anymore, my partner and my son will be better off without me. I have tried, I really have, but I just can't do this anymore. I look at my son and wonder how he is being effected by me.

Depression is a horrible illness Tree1000, forcing you into a negative tunnel vision of your world. But the fact that you are not giving in and letting it beat you shows you can fight it. It's a relentless battle but one that you can win. Give the drugs a chance to work and try and review each day and find an achievement; however small and give yourself a little bit of praise. It's an illness, the things you are feeling are symptoms and part of getting better is learning to rationalise the worthless feelings and view them as part of the depression and not as part of you iuswim. I hope your day is better tomorrow.

I have noticed you are posting at night.
If you are in the UK time zone, all things look bad at night time.

How are you feeling this morning?